Advent week 2, Paleo week 2 Recap

Dear Friends,

I pray this Advent season has been beautiful for you and your family. I know for me it truly has been a challenging season but God has provided so much grace and I can't begin to tell you how lovely that has been. I have completed week 2 of paleo and I'll recap that for you as well.


Last Sunday I began to notice I wasn't feeling myself. I was tired and my asthma began to flare. As someone who has really gotten my asthma under great control this was abnormal and I started to worry, was I getting sick? I then remembered I spent Saturday evening on a farm, in the woods, on an old train looking at lights. It was a cold night but this was the perfect conditions to set everything off into a whirl wind for the allergy ridden asthmatic that I am. This was different than my normal and progressed much more than in the past. I won't go into all I've felt in the past week but I'll tell you here we are a week later and I am not 100%. Exhausted doesn't cover it. My asthma is still bad despite my efforts with medications, tea, and rest. Thankfully while this hasn't been easy I know it's a grace from God and I ask He join my suffering for the good of those who have lung ailments worse than mine. That He would heal them and invite them into the light of heaven. I love knowing God can use my worst for His best.


This challenge has forced me to rest. I am not one to rest I am one to go and accomplish but I've had to sleep. I've had to say no. I've had to keep quiet and honestly it has been helpful in reminding me to truly embrace this season. To wait and watch and listen. To be still and know that He is God. Thankful He has come and answered me.


He reminded my heart on Wednesday : Isaiah 40:25-31

To whom can you liken me as an equal?
says the Holy One.
Lift up your eyes on high
and see who has created these things:
He leads out their army and numbers them,
calling them all by name.
By his great might and the strength of his power
not one of them is missing!
Why, O Jacob, do you say,
and declare, O Israel,
“My way is hidden from the LORD,
and my right is disregarded by my God”?

Do you not know
or have you not heard?
The LORD is the eternal God,
creator of the ends of the earth.
He does not faint nor grow weary,
and his knowledge is beyond scrutiny.
He gives strength to the fainting;
for the weak he makes vigor abound.
Though young men faint and grow weary,
and youths stagger and fall,
They that hope in the LORD will renew their strength,
they will soar as with eagles’ wings;
They will run and not grow weary,
walk and not grow faint.


It's as though He was telling me... He will give me strength when I feel weak. He doesn't grow tired. No matter how tired and weak I am, He will not only never grow faint but He renews my strength. It's as though I heard these words in a new way. Friends have you ever thought about that? God, never gets tired. He never takes a vacation or calls in sick. He is eternal. He always was, always is, always will be. He's with you from beginning to end. Oh friends I needed this on Wednesday.



He spoke to me on Friday through Isaiah 48:17-19

Thus says the LORD, your redeemer,
the Holy One of Israel:
I, the LORD, your God,
teach you what is for your good,
and lead you on the way you should go.
If you would hearken to my commandments,
your prosperity would be like a river,
and your vindication like the waves of the sea;
Your descendants would be like the sand,
and those born of your stock like its grains,
Their name never cut off
or blotted out from my presence.


These words Friday really spoke to my heard. Listen to His commands and He will take care of the rest. My heart was reminded of our Blessed Mother calling to us at the wedding of Cana: Do whatever He tells you. She's echoing this reminder friends. She's telling us listen just as He told us to Listen. When the servants at the wedding did as she said, did what Jesus told them a miracle occurred. Water turned to wine. Friends this reminded me on my busy Friday that a miracle can happen.

Friends these are a few examples of how God blessed my heart this week. It helped me so much to get through each day with His help.  He also helped me to stick to Paleo. In a week where I didn't feel myself I didn't want to cook, but He helped me try. I didn't want to eat healthy I wanted comfort food but He reminded me to want to be as healthy as possible reflecting on my love and care for Him and his creation. So here we are week 2 done and I'll tell you it wasn't easy. I realized how simple the excuses I make for eating bad can be and on more days than not I could have found a reason to justify cheating. The only thing I will say I was not faithful to was mints. I actually haven't found anything that tells me they are wrong but I imagine they are as they are processed. I bought sugar free mints as an effort but mints are what got me through work. I couldn't have worked this week had it not been for mint, tea and albuterol. I want to be honest with you and perhaps there is an alternative I didn't find. If you know of any let me know. 

What do I notice different physically this week on Paleo? I came to the awareness that the strange aches and pains I've had in my joints over the last several months seem to be gone. No migrating knee pain, no hand pain, no begging my husband to rub this or that. When asked my husband says I've complained of these discomforts our whole marriage which makes me laugh because I wouldn't have thought it had been that long. He agrees I haven't complained. Only time will tell if this truly is related to Paleo or if I happen to just be having a good couple weeks.  Friends have you experienced any changes like this? 

Yesterday we finished 33 Days of Mourning Glory on the Feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe. It is a consecration to Mary private retreat which my husband and I completed together. It really opened my mind and thoughts to Mary's role, which honestly I am still trying to understand more and more. I am thankful for our Blessed Mother and ask for her intercession. It was great to read some of the things in that book that I had never heard, as well as inspired me to know more about Our Lady. Friends have you done this retreat? If you haven't I recommend it. I would love to hear your thoughts on Mary. How has she inspired you?

Today is Gaudete Sunday and my husband and I have been discussing more how we can celebrate advent. In an effort to establish traditions this year we landed on the following: 

We put up our tree today. We have a fake tree so pulled it out of the garage, fluffed the branches and it is up. We didn't put anything on it. It's barren. We thought this was a beautiful reminder in our family room that we are waiting. We are discussing putting on the lights and turning them on just for today for the feast of St. Lucy, and waiting until Christmas for otherwise. So far, it's without lights, an arrow pointed heavenward. Part of me wishes we did this from the first Sunday because it really seems like a statement in that room now. Christmas is coming but we are waiting to celebrate it before we can prepare for it. No tinsel or lights or Christmas music just yet. Christmas will keep just a few more days while we reflect, pray and ready our hearts. We will decorate for Christmas when Christmas comes.

Rejoice in the Lord always; again I say, rejoice.
Indeed, the Lord is near

God bless you friends.

Anita

Advent week 1 Overview 2015 and My Paleo Journey

Dear Friends.
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Alright on to Advent. Advent means Coming. We prepare for His coming, both to celebrate His birth and to remember His second coming.  Week 1 is a reflection on Hope. We are waiting for the fulfillment of our hope. Thanks be to God there is hope.

Friends I didn't grow up Catholic as many of you know, so coming up with ways our family can celebrate Advent and hold the Christmas celebration to the Christmas season has involved a lot of research. It's been a growing experience but we've got our special journey to Advent wreath out and our nativity sans wise men and baby Jesus and we have made the attempt. We haven't listened to Christmas music in our home or cars but haven't avoided places playing it out. We would be hermits if we did. We have enjoyed letting our hearts prepare the way of the Lord in our hearts and home. We've kept the TV off and really been good for our family to unplug and take a break. We have tried to light our wreath each night but I can be honest and tell you a few nights I've been so tired from work I didn't take the time. We have been praying and seeking and friends I started my paleo journey last Sunday.

Paleo?

Yes this girl is trying it out. I did a lot of research to see medically and scientifically is it worth it? I think it's a great thing to pick up in Advent as I deny myself. It hasn't been easy, friends I wasn't eating the best possible that I could prior to this but in our family it has been a gift.  As the cookies start to come out all around us, I've been able to say no. It's made me more aware of how often I was choosing the easy thing which wasn't best, and how it really isn't as tough as I thought it was to eat well. We have had some of the yummiest food in the last week and I've made it. We haven't eaten out as much, which in turn saved us money. We haven't indulged but have practiced temperance. I won't be on paleo forever but I do think its helped me to find a lot of foods I like and choose the best choice. I have yet to have anything that isn't paleo approved and I hope to keep it that way through Advent. By God's grace I can do it. There is hope for me in His grace friends.

St. Teresa of Avila wrote in Interior Castles "This body has one fault, that the more people pamper it, the more its wants are made known. It is strange how much it likes to be indulged. How well it finds some good pretext to deceive the poor soul!"  Remembering this helps me not to cheat.  I know if I have one thing...I'll just want more and before I know it paleo will be dead. So I'm going to establish new habits. If I can do it you can too. Trust me it's not easy with my busy work schedule and long commute to work but I have hope that all my efforts will be worth it. 

Friends I don't share my journey with Paleo and Advent to brag about what I'm doing. No, in all I hope to bring glory to Christ. I share to encourage you to think about what you can do big or small to offer to God during this time. We prepare for both the birth of Christ and His second coming in this advent season. This season has been lovely. It's really grown my heart. I'm currently reading Jesus of Nazareth by Benedict and friends if you haven't read it RUN, go get it. It is amazing. It's not just for Catholics my protestant friends will love it too. Check it out here http://www.amazon.com/Jesus-Nazareth-Baptism-Jordan-Transfiguration/dp/1586171984  (not an affiliate link just saved you a google search).  

I hope this Advent season has touched your heart, and if not start today. Make an effort to prepare the way of the Lord in your heart this season. Let us cry "Come Emmanuel" before we sing Joy to the World. Let us ask why we celebrate and reflect on that before we just jump in.

The gospel reading from Friday Morning touched my heart so much.
Matthew 9:27-31
As Jesus went on from there, two blind men followed him, crying loudly, “Have mercy on us, Son of David!” When he entered the house, the blind men came to him; and Jesus said to them, “Do you believe that I am able to do this?” They said to him, “Yes, Lord.” Then he touched their eyes and said, “according to your faith let it be done to you.” And their eyes were opened. Then Jesus sternly ordered them, “See that no one knows of this.” But they went away and spread the news about him throughout that district.

Friends in this season I ask that the Son of David open my eyes and heal me. I believe He can do this and I ask Him for healing physically, spiritually and mentally.  I pray for this for you friends too. I ask that our loving Savior touch your eyes. He is our hope friends. His love for us is great and He always answers if you call on Him. I'm calling on Him for you.  Share with me if I can be offering up for any specific prayer requests either through my Facebook page, comments or you can e-mail me at beautifulgoodtrue@gmail.com.   Please keep my husband and I in your prayers as well. 

May God bless you and keep you. 

<3

Healing the Wounded Culture : Bringing the Wholeness of Healing to Humanity

The 84th Annual meeting of the Catholic Medical Association occurred in Philadelphia, PA October 1-3, 2015. More than 600 people attended comprised of Doctors, Physician Assistants, Nurses, other members of health care, spouses, priests, sisters, and even a few adorable babies. It was three days of discussion on the wounds our culture has and how to heal and care for them. We started each day with confession, mass and the rosary and then took a big dive in to topics that concern the dignity of the human person from conception to natural death. As my favorite saint, St. Francis De Sales says "To be perfect in one’s vocation is nothing else than to perform the duties and offices to which one is obliged, solely for the honor and love of God, referring to His glory. Whoever works in this manner may be called perfect in his state, a man according to the heart and will of God."  The exact nature of the conference is to grow in knowledge to practice medicine with greater honor and love of God, for His glory.

Often we reflected throughout the days on the Holy Father's explanation that the church is a field hospital. As health care professionals this picture of a hospital, mending wounds of the broken both brings a physical image and a spiritual one. Physical in that in various ways we heal body wounds. We deal with the bleeding, the disease, the disordered in an attempt to manage the care of a patient in the safest and best way possible. Spiritual in that we see patients wounded with all sorts of circumstances that affect the mind and the spirit and each we attempt to manage. Each of the members of the CMA know, that no matter how great a provider of health care in these areas, without the assistance of the Divine Physician our efforts are feeble at best, but with the persistent help of Our Lord and the intercession of the Angels and Saints we can accomplish great things.

There were a full slate of speakers including: Kathleen Raviele MD, Chris Kalenborn MD, Gerald Burke MD,  Angela Lanfranchi MD,  Anthony Levantino MD, Marie Joseph, Theresa Burke MD , Margurite Duane MD, Rev. Tadeusz Pacholyczk Ph. D., Thomas Hilgers MD, Mark Houck, Brad Wilcox Ph.D., Philip Mango Ph.D., Richard Fitzgibbons MD, Peter Kleponis Ph.D. Damon Owens, Gregory Popcak Ph.D., Rev Roger Landry, Rev Dennis Billy, Rev. Robert Spitzer, Peter Kreeft Ph.D., Rev. Juan Velez MD, Marie-alberte Boursiquot MD, and Gianna Jessen. 

• THURSDAY dealt with  BODY WOUNDS.



Photo by John Hartman, MD 

• We discussed the damage that contraception, Plan B, Assisted Reproduction and abortion have caused. While it is long standing that the church has long challenged each of these, it is important to note that the Roman Catholic Church is not against them for the sake of picking and choosing things to stand for. They are against the destruction of life. Life, marked by the unique DNA present from conception different from the mother or the father, is precious and to be protected. As health care providers we took the oath to do no harm and we each take that oath seriously even down to our smallest patients. It's not easy but we want to protect our patients from the increased risk of breast cancer, liver cancer, stroke, and blood clots. We want to protect the children at their smallest state and help guide others to the truth. We heard from passionate people who are experts in their field. We then spent time talking and discussing how to heal, help and come to the aid of those who need us. Marie Joseph who runs a Women's Center spoke on the need for beauty. She said "Our center is beautiful, it looks like a Spa." She shared with me that its that beauty that captures many of the women that enter her center to know that they are cared for. They aren't just another number but valued. She challenged us all to get involved and stop watching from the sidelines and reminded us that "Crisis Pregnancy" is no way to discuss the life that has been given to the world.   We learned about the beauty of Rachel's Vineyard and how women all over the world are invited to work through their struggles related to abortion. We also learned how deep some of the hurt and anger run and how prevalent suicide is among those who abort. We were educated on healthier options and the need for inclusion in medical school curricula. We discussed how Naprotechnology is more effective than assisted reproductive techniques such as IVF. 
• FRIDAY: covered MIND WOUNDS 
• We reviewed the most common psychological and medical issues associated with pornography and sexual addiction, both of these issues leading to a significant impact on our marriages ending in divorce. We discussed the medical, psychological and social impacts of these and other sexual disorders.  We discussed how to provide care and help for our patients who are struggling and reminded that we can only fill and heal others when we ourselves are filled and healed.  It was astounding to hear how many struggle with sexual and emotional scars and to learn how satan has twisted such a beautiful gift into so many things that bind and break people. We know pain that is not transformed and treated is transmitted. The cycle of sickness in the mind only leads to more wounds in others that are physical, mental and spiritual if we do not come to heal and be healed.  Proper counseling was discussed and the importance of identifying the struggles and meeting them where they are with love and compassion.  In the talks Dr. Richard Fitzgibbons explained the identity crisis that occurs when masculinity is reduced to athleticism.  He shared " Masculinity is not determined by athleticism. It is the degree to which you configure yourself to Christ."   It is only when we can share the love of Christ with others that we can bring wholeness to these wounds. 
• SATURDAY: discussed SPIRIT WOUNDS 



Cathedral of St. Peter and Paul

• We discussed the nature of evil as presented by a church certified exorcist. He shared that demons howl at the name of St. John Paul II. We heard  how important it is to address spiritual wounds and the challenges in doing so.  We talked about culture, about what it is and isn't and how important it is to grow and shape the world.  We need to love people, to care about them physically, mentally and spiritually.  At times this will call us to spend a few more moments listening, a moment encouraging, a few minutes asking questions. Our efforts won't be wasted. It is when we put together our love for God and love for medicine that we can truly be great providers.  We heard from Peter Kreeft, PhD who shared "There is no war between science and religion. If so name a casualty."  He went on to encourage those in attendance not to stop our efforts to care for each person. "We need to know people and their messiness and God and His perfection. We need both."  Finally we ended with what we began with : healing through the Eucharist and the ultimate example of brokenness  in Christ was offered by Archbishop Timothy Broglio and Most Reverend John J. McIntyre at the Cathedral Basilica Shrine of Saints Peter and Paul.  A beautiful church in the heart of Philadelphia and a beautiful sight to see all in attendance on their knees before the blessed sacrament.  The sight of all of us kneeling together is one I will hold on to in my heart. All different age, races, cultures, areas of specialty in the medical field, and yet we all have Jesus in common, and His healing mission. 

Throughout the conference we saw two statues at the front of the room: one of the scourged and wounded Christ and one of the resurrected Christ. We as providers know that when we care for the wounded we care for Christ. The wounded are not alone, for Our Lord knows the wounds you carry as He carried them too. We also know that the resurrected Christ reminds us of healing. Death couldn't hold Him, the grave couldn't restrain Him, He lives and gives breath to dry bones. 

Photo by John Hartman, MD 

This was my second CMA conference and friends it was nothing short of beautiful. I could write so much more on this but I hope to just share a brief overview of the amazing experience  I'm reminded that I'm not alone in my desire to care for all from conception to natural death. I'm encouraged that there are others fighting with me and that God is calling new ones everyday.  I know that this conference has been a breath of fresh air for myself and many others in attendance. You see, we can't separate our medical practice from our beliefs because it is our very beliefs that shape our love and care of each person. It's only fitting that there is a conference that puts the two together: that brings the beauty of mass and then equips us to truly "Go Forth and Serve the Lord."  I met some amazing friends, and reconnected with some lovely people as well.  It blessed my heart to enjoy the time with such kind and caring people. 

Photo by John Hartman, MD 

As I went back these past two weeks to work I see how each patient comes in reminds me of the two Christ statues. Some were broken and bruised, others were healed from their wounds due to care. Whichever Christ they represent, I'm privileged to love and care  for Christ in each of them.  I hope not only to see them as Christ but they might my Lord through my care for them.  

The 85th annual Catholic Medical Association will be in Washington D.C  October 13-15th. 
     
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Greatness of Humility

Hi friends!

I hope you are well. Do you ever think about how God has grown you in a given amount of time? I know I look back and count my blessing and remember the challenges I've overcome. All of that is beautiful. I don't necessarily think back on the vices and virtues but as time progresses my growth will just present itself almost as a surprise. In other places where I haven't grown pops up at time too. Oh my faults. Many, many faults. 

How true, the closer we get to God and His perfection, the more we see where we need to grow. When I think of Christ and His love, His compassion, His strength, His suffering and all of His life I see perfection. While I know that by myself I will never be perfect I know that God can grow me and shape me into what He wills if I am faithful to be clay in His hands. If I've learned anything in the last  two years it's humility that allows me to be clay. 

In a world that pushes pride, our savior calls us to humility. He opposes the proud and gives grace to the humble. So when you see ______ Pride. Black Pride. White Pride. Gay Pride. Straight Pride. Married Pride. Single Pride. Educated Pride. Uneducated Pride....whatever it is. It's not the preceding word that God opposed it's the latter half: the pride. He loves Black, White, Gay Straight, Married, Single, Educated, Uneducated. He opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. 

If I learn anything from learning more and more about God it is how prideful I am. You see my savior, He humbled Himself to become a man, to walk this earth, to be beaten and hated and killed for my sake and then He rose. He came humbly as a baby. He humbly fell carrying the cross when He could have called legions of angels to carry it for Him. He humbly allowed Himself to be tempted as we are. He humbly worked as a carpenter. He humbly befriended prostitutes and tax collectors. His beautiful humility beckons my heart. Thankfully He has given me thousands of saints to show me that even in our present day humility is possible. Even if you have an affluent job or social status, you can use it for the good of others. Even if you have nothing, you can give of yourself to others. No matter what your circumstance, He is calling you to be humble, to know that every good and perfect gift comes from Him and that all of your talents and gifts are given not earned.  

You friend are loved and humility allows Him to fill your heart and hands with love. It is amazing how He loves you and me. Amazing who He cares for you and me. You see friend when your heart is filled with humility is when you lead others to Him. The saints reflected Him greatly because of their great humility. 

To be taken with love for a soul, God does not look on its greatness, but the greatness of its humility.
--St John of the Cross

Humility is the foundation of all the other virtues hence, in the soul in which this virtue does not exist there cannot be any other virtue except in mere appearance.
--Saint Augustine

He who wants to learn true humility should reflect upon the Passion of Jesus.
-- St Faustina, Divine Mercy in my Soul (267)

The highest point of humility consists in not merely acknowledging one's abjection, but in taking pleasure therein, not from any want of breadth or courage, but to give the more glory to God's Divine Majesty, and to esteem one's neighbour more highly than one's self.
--St Francis De Sales

The most powerful weapon to conquer the devil is humility. For, as he does not know at all how to employ it, neither does he know how to defend himself from it.
--Saint Vincent de Paul

These are just a few quotes by them on this virtue. Friend I encourage you to really think on these. Ask God to teach you what St. John of the Cross, St Augustine, St Faustina, St Francis De Sales and St. Vincent De Paul really knew about these. Ask them to pray for you that you would learn what they knew.  If you don't know about their lives I encourage you to do a little search and look at their example. Each of them points us so clearly to Christ by their humility. 

St. John of the Cross - pray for us

 St Augustine - pray for us

 St Faustina  - pray for us

 St Francis De Sales - pray for us

St. Vincent De Paul - pray for us

Friends I'm praying for us, that you and I will both continue to grow in humility. That we will reflect Him and point people to Him.

<3


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Easy Chicken Sausage Veggie Quinoa Lettuce Wraps

Hello Friends! A few weeks ago I was looking for a yummy lunch for my husband and I. I try and sneak as many veggies into his food that I can. When we married he ate salad, green beans, carrots and corn as his only "veggies." I knew I needed to help him add some more things and now he eats several things but it has taken some creativity on my part. In the end this process has increased my veggie intake, made cooking more adventurous and been a fun challenge. I want to blog some of my recipe adventures for you and here's my first go. Note I am not a chef, and I am not a professional recipe writer but I included what I would think would be needed to recreate this. 

So recently I went to The Cheesecake Factory and found on their small plates menu lettuce wraps. I've never been big into lettuce wraps but let me tell you go and get the "Mexican" ones. You won't be sorry.  I tried googling for a make it at home recipe and I haven't found one. This isn't one either...but it is a yummy lettuce wrap option if your craving something like that. 

What you need:

2  tablespoons of Olive Oil
1 clove of garlic (not pictured)
1/2 large onion
2 mild chicken sausage
1/2 teaspoon chili powder
1 teaspoon of cumin
garlic, salt, pepper to taste
2 cups cooked quinoa
1 small zucchini (the one pictures is a bigger one... I used 1/2)
1/2 cup frozen corn
1 cup frozen sweet potato
Butter lettuce leaves (not pictured)

I use mostly organic or green wise options but we have only been big on that for the last year or so. I'm still switching things like my spices and such. We didn't want to be wasteful but we do want to be healthy.  We do find it more expensive and one way we get around this is using frozen veggies and going to farmers markets when we can. The only one in town is on Saturday mornings and the last 6 Saturdays I have either been out of town or busy with something else that didn't permit shopping locally. So frozen it has been. If you live alone or are a small family of 2 this is a great way to add veggies and not be wasteful with things going bad. 

I failed to capture the step by step pictures that an expert blogger would but I will see what I can do in the future.  I start by chopping the onion so its ready to go. Cue the tears.  Once I'm done having a good cry I set the onion aside. I put oil and 1 clove worth of garlic in a skillet on medium heat.  I do not use fresh garlic but I use minced organic garlic in a jar. You are welcome to use whatever makes you happy.  Saute chopped onion and sweet potato together in the olive oil/garlic goodness.   During this process have quinoa cooking. You can do this via stove top or microwave depending on your multitasking skills. I just follow the directions on the bag and I really enjoy the multicolored version from Trader Joe's. If I don't have this on hand I have substituted with Risotto which is really good! Ok back to the directions...

 Remove the sausage from the casing and break it up as it cooks. Once cooked stir in zucchini, corn and spices. Cook another 3-4 minutes. When everything looks nicely melded together its done. If it looks raw, veggies are still frozen keep going. If you stir every once and a while I've found its good about not burning.   I wish technology could allow you to smell the goodness that this is. OH gosh it smelled great. Listen don't skip on the Chili powder. It's not hot it just makes it all perfectly yummy. 

Add in quinoa to warm it through. Spoon into butter lettuce leaves. It may look like this: 

You can add a little sprinkle cheese if you like. you honestly can adjust this however you think will taste good. Send me your ideas and pictures please. If you can capture smell and send that do it as well :)
My husband and I both thought it was delicious. A great adventure of simply throwing things together to see what came out. Necessity is the mother of invention. New easy go to dinner/ lunch/leftover redo option in our house.


I hope you enjoyed this recipe. Have anything to add? Comment below.
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Recipe without the commentary:

2  tablespoons of Olive Oil
1 clove of garlic (not pictured)
1/2 large onion
2 mild chicken sausage
1/2 teaspoon chili powder
1 teaspoon of cumin
garlic, salt, pepper to taste
2 cups cooked quinoa
1 small zucchini
1/2 cup frozen corn
1 cup frozen sweet potato
Butter lettuce leaves (not pictured )

Directions:
Chop onion. Put oil and 1 clove worth of garlic in a skillet. Saute chopped onion and sweet potato together.  During this process have quinoa cooking. You can do this via stove top or microwave depending on your multitasking skills. I just follow the directions on the bag. Remove the sausage from the casing and break it up as it cooks. Once cooked stir in zucchini, corn and spices. Cook another 3-4 minutes. Add in quinoa to warm it through. Spoon into butter lettuce leaves

Substitutions:
I've made this dish in many ways. The key ingredient is the chili powder. I've switched out veggies including frozen butternut squash, peas, kale and broccoli. I try and use what I have on hand. Also can switch quinoa for risotto.

Serves:
1 wife and 1 hungry husband
(maybe 3 if you ate small portions but my husband eats twice what I do). To make it bigger just make more quinoa and add a little more of each of the veggies and another sausage.... or more if you need a lot. You really can't mess this up unless you burn it and even then it may taste pretty ok.

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For When You Feel You Don't Measure Up

I, Zechariah, raised my eyes and looked:
there was a man with a measuring line in his hand.
I asked, “Where are you going?”
He answered, “To measure Jerusalem,
to see how great is its width and how great its length.”

Then the angel who spoke with me advanced,
and another angel came out to meet him and said to him,
“Run, tell this to that young man:
People will live in Jerusalem as though in open country,
because of the multitude of men and beasts in her midst.
But I will be for her an encircling wall of fire, says the LORD,
and I will be the glory in her midst.”

-Zec 2:2-5

Friends have you ever tried to measure yourself? Not your height or your weight but your value, and your worth? Have you ever tried to look and see how you compare to others? Maybe taking a self inventory you can see that your good at this, but not so good here or there. Maybe you feel not good at anything...or maybe pride has crept in so deep that you can't see your faults. Whatever the measuring stick you use, your value is greater than can be measured just as Jerusalem was too vast to be measured. Your value and worth have nothing to do with your job, your bank account, your looks, or your accomplishments. Your worth is determined in Christ's love for you that He laid himself down to die for you.  Just as the angel proclaimed " But I will be for her an encircling wall of fire, says the LORD, and I will be the glory in her midst.”  

Friends can you imagine that? Imagine God as an encircling wall of fire for your heart. Imagine Him being the glory in your midst. You friend are beautiful. You are His beloved. Let the God of all creation step in and be the one to measure you for His standard is love. In love He sees you in your brokenness, your places where you fail and falter. Your places where you succeed and in all of them He says " But I will be for her an encircling wall of fire, says the LORD, and I will be the glory in her midst.”


Friends let Him be your wall of fire. Let Him be the glory in your midst. Let Him fill the empty places.

Peace be with you my friend.

---
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Persistent in Prayer

Ever wonder if you can bother God by asking Him the same thing over and over? I have wondered. You see I know He is all knowing and I know He hears me and so I ask in prayer for things of my hearts desire praying only if Gods will. I find my heart asking and than believing the lies that the enemy feeds me : Don't ask again He's busy.

As if the God of the universe who knit me together in my mothers womb could be too busy. As if He could care less about me than I do myself. Its a lie in an effort to shut down prayer because friends we know there is power in prayer. It's a lie that makes us feel as if we can't approach Our Lord with our needs when He tells us to ask, seek and knock. He wants us to bang down the door in prayer. He wants us to push and persist.

He listens better than the best friend you have ever had, and meets you exactly where you are. He loves you no matter what you've done or haven't done and invites you into a personal relationship with him. You see God knows my deepest needs and cares and yet He patiently listens to me in all I have to say whether in vocal or contemplative prayer. He does this not only for me but every single person on the planet. How grand His love is for us.

Scripture reminds us to persist in prayer.


Luke 11:5-8
And he said to them, “Suppose one of you has a friend to whom he goes at midnight and says, ‘Friend, lend me three loaves of bread,6 for a friend of mine has arrived at my house from a journey and I have nothing to offer him,’7and he says in reply from within, ‘Do not bother me; the door has already been locked and my children and I are already in bed. I cannot get up to give you anything.’8I tell you, if he does not get up to give him the loaves because of their friendship, he will get up to give him whatever he needs because of his persistence.


Luke 18:1-8
Then he told them a parable about the necessity for them to pray always without becoming weary. He said,2“There was a judge in a certain town who neither feared God nor respected any human being.3And a widow in that town used to come to him and say, ‘Render a just decision for me against my adversary.’4For a long time the judge was unwilling, but eventually he thought, ‘While it is true that I neither fear God nor respect any human being,5 because this widow keeps bothering me I shall deliver a just decision for her lest she finally come and strike me.’”6The Lord said, “Pay attention to what the dishonest judge says.7 Will not God then secure the rights of his chosen ones who call out to him day and night? Will he be slow to answer them?8I tell you, he will see to it that justice is done for them speedily. But when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on earth?”

The saints remind us

" Through communion with Him, the Holy Spirit makes us spiritual, he returns us to Paradise, brings us to the Kingdom of heaven and into adoption as sons, he gives us the confidence to call God Father and to participate in the grace of Christ to be called a child of light and to partake in eternal glory" - St. Basil 

I am his daughter and He loves me patiently. He has adopted me and I can imagine him saying "My beloved I am with you always" when the lies of his absence creep into my mind. You see no matter how alone I may feel at times I never am. He never leaves me side. Yours either friend. He's right there next to you.

Friends we weren't commanded to pray sometimes, occasionally, once in a while. We were told pray without ceasing. He wants to be asked. He wants to be sought. He wants to be pursued.  He wants our lives to be prayerful acts for Him and His glory.

So friends what have you asked Him for? Have you been persistent in prayer? Have you sought the Lord and fasted? Have you prayed without ceasing? Have you approached the throne of grace with your petitions? Finally friends.. Will you love Him even if He says No? Will you trust Him and His timing? When we seek Him and pray He doesn't always do exactly what we want, how we want and when we want but He does always listen, always answer and always has perfect timing. 

Friends you are beautiful and loved. 

Persevere in your requests to the Lord. Pray without Ceasing and Trust that He is with you.  He isn't too busy, He hasn't forgotten, He is listening, and waiting.

---

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Loved By God

Friends,
Do you know that you are loved? Can you open your mind to the possibility that the God of the universe, the one who created everything loves you? I had the privilege of seeing Sister Miriam James Heidland, S.O.L.T speak at a Women's Conference a few weeks ago.  Honestly, she shared a heart and love for God that was beautiful. She reminded me of something that perhaps is easy to forget at times: God loves us. You see His love isn't generalized. He does just love "everyone" as a whole but not specifically. His love is tender, it's personal, it's unique for each and every person on earth and that's amazing. He loves because that is His nature: God is Love.  Couple that with being all knowing and for me these truths are amazing. He patiently listens to each of us as we share our needs, whether as a silent whisper of the heart or shouts at heaven.   Such truth, if you really stop and think about it, can seem impossible. Someone who loves you so greatly, knowing everything about you does exist.

There are times in my life I've felt far from that kind of love, and if I'm honest the times I felt farthest are because I moved myself. I set up definitions in my mind as to when God could love me or not based on when I felt lovable or lovely. I thought I was lovely and lovable if I could achieve, or perform. When I had no "big" sins then I was lovable, or so I thought. My view of love was based in my experience of love taught to me, but my view was broken. His love has never failed me.

I've learned that its not about big sins or little sins --I'm sinful. period. I'm not worthy but He loves me in a perfect and unwavering way. He cares for me when I don't care for myself, He loves me when I fail to perform, His mercy is amazing. He calls me beloved. He calls me beautiful.  He calls me blessed. He calls me to Him so tenderly and reminds my heart that there is no place outside of Him that I can be loved like that. My husband gives me a beautiful demonstration to help me understand how big this love is with how selflessly He loves me. It helps but is only a glimmer of the truth of what I'm describing.

Sister Miriam and I 

Sister Miriam shared parts of her story in which she dealt with life circumstances that affected her ability to see love as God loves. I won't share her story, because it's not mine it's hers, but thankfully she's shared it in her book: Loved As I Am. I read it and honestly I'll tell you it's great. It's a beautiful story where she shares honestly about the parts of her life that were challenging where she didn't feel lovely and used all sorts of things to fill the gap. She had circumstances that produced challenges and she honestly shared the struggles and the triumphs. She shares how Our Lord fought for her when she didn't feel loved and He loved her just as she was. It's His love that makes her beautiful, and friends I'll tell you: she's gorgeous. The joy and love that overflows her heart is inspiring and if you ever get a chance to listen to her I recommend it.  The book covers the human person and God's love. Through small in size, it delivers a big dose of truth broken down into small bite size pieces.  She does that when she speaks as well. She's very eloquent and yet is able to explain complex things simply. She shows a true knowledge that she conveys well.  She is inspiring. She reminds you that no matter your problem, addiction, hang up or break down that there is hope.  She reminds us we can all be holy. No matter how far you stray God will never cease to welcome you with open arms.   She proclaimed at the conference I went to "I'm a broken lady who's seriously loved by God." She's tasted and seen that the Lord is good and invites you to do the same. She told a room full of women "God is always after your heart" and she's absolutely right. It's nice to hear it. To be reminded. He's pursuing me all the time and it's lovely to know that.  Friends. He's pursing you too.


Friends I know that God loves you. Remember as Pope Saint John Paul II said " We are not the sum of our weaknesses and failure; we are the sum of the Fathers love for us. " As I type those words it speaks volumes to my heart in a week that I've had weaknesses and failures galore. I know it's God teaching me, growing me and leading me to grow in humility and trust in Him. I am so thankful for His love even on my worst days and it's knowing He loves me that makes everything else so amazing.  You remember friend. God loves you more than you could ever imagine. You are His beloved. <3

For more posts like this one feel free to subscribe to updates! Let me know if you have any requests for posts. I am so thankful to each of you who read my posts and for the many who have shared them, I can't thank you enough. <3
You can follow Sister Miriam on Twitter @onegroovynun  and there are several youtube videos where you can listen to her.
For my conversion story click here 

When All You Need Is Rest

Matthew 11:28-30
Jesus said:

“Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened,
and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me,
for I am meek and humble of heart;
and you will find rest for yourselves.
For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.”


Just two verses which isn't a lot in length but contains so much.
Come to me - He says.
He doesn't just call, He calls and promises. He calls to all "who labor and are burdened" (everyone).
He invites "I will give you rest."

Rest just sounds wonderful. Truly. Both as I'm physically and mentally tired from the adventures life has thrown at me and yet I'm never too tired for the call. I've been reflecting on the stations of the cross a new thing to me as I didn't grow up Catholic. Honestly one of the most beautiful things though. I start them at bedtime and while I don't get through all 14 before I fall asleep, I come to rest contemplating the journey my Lord walked for me and I pick up where I left off the next night. As I pray on this I learn so much about his humility and meekness. So much about the steps He took and what He could have said or done in pride. By His stripes we are healed and He bore each one patiently and humbly.

He tell us "Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for yourselves. For my yoke is easy and my burden light."


Take His yoke and learn from Him. Learn to be meek and humble of heart.
When I place my world: my doubts, my fears, my struggles in the hands of God, when I subtract my pride and cut out my will and hand Him everything that's already His there is rest. Yet too often I find I forget the first step to rest. I stand there holding it all and asking for rest and I'm sure Jesus has a good chuckle because this gospel reading is one I know well and it plays in my mind in flashes. "I will give you rest."

Friends in our world we aren't about rest. We aren't about quiet or humble and meek. We celebrate pride, we promote busy-ness and call it business. Work isn't wrong but when you forget the purpose of work you lose it's value. When you forget that the job or vocation is a means to your life and not your life itself it's easy to lose who you are and become the job. You friend are so much more than what you produce. Your productions are beautiful but even if you produced nothing you would be worth everything. For our worth isn't measured in dollars or certifications, letters behind our name or items we own. Our very worth is defined by Him who adopted us as sons and daughters and said "I will give you rest." Sometimes the loudness of the world is almost deafening. Between the news, the media, the social media, the text messages and phone calls and mail. Between the alarm clocks and deadlines and responsibility the message gets fuzzy and we start to ask "When can I have rest?" Where's my break? Vacation?

He already promised it before you even existed. He spoke into existence His rest. To take His yoke- to let Him lead us, to learn from Him and His heart. This is rest. This is comfort. To know we aren't going it alone. To know He will never leave us or forsake us and to rest in His mercy. No matter what your facing today big or small He can give you rest. 

Anyone Who Fails To Go Forward Begins To Go Back

I've found myself immersed in books. From St. Teresa of Avila to C.S. Lewis. From Fulton Sheen to G.K. Chesterton. The beauty in each of the books I've read recently has been incredible and the truth astounds me. In each there is a calling to purse God stronger, to know Him more, to be closer to Jesus and be more like Him.

As I finished Interior Castles by St. Teresa of Avila yesterday I was struck by something she wrote.

"I repeat that if you have this view you must not build upon foundations of prayer and contemplation alone, for, unless you strive after virtues and practice them, you will never grow to be more than dwarfs. God grant that nothing worse than this may happen- for as you know, anyone who fails to go forward begins to go back, and love, I believe , can never be content to stay for long where it is." p234.

While she wrote these words, this sentiment is one of I've seen come to a head in both Catholic and Protestant Circles. The need for more. The need for pursuit. The idea that we can not be stagnant.  I've read books on both sides of the theological realm which call for this same idea. Just to name a few as this is by no means an exhaustive list:

Radical by David Platt 

The Explicit Gospel by Matt Chandler 

Not A Fan by Kyle Idelman

Crazy Love by Francis Chan 

In A Pit With A Lion On A Snowy Day by Mark Batterson 

Anything by Jennie Allen

Desiring God by John Piper

Chasing Francis by Ian Cron 

Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis

Introduction To The Devout Life by St. Francis De Sales

Interior Castles by St. Teresa of Avila 

Orthodoxy by G.K. Chesterton 

He Leadeth Me by Walter Ciszek 

The Joy of the Gospel by Pope Francis

They all disagree on dogmas and doctrine but all scream to run with everything you have after God. They push you to not just know Him but to serve Him. The above authors are in all sorts of churches from Calvinist to Catholic and everything in between and yet they all agree that there is more than just one prayer to be said or a box to be checked. They push and plead with the reader to move the heart and the feet in the direction of forward because again "anyone who fails to go forward begins to go back." 

How much would we believe it if a doctor shared the need to move forward as a statement about his practice of medicine. If he failed to continue to go forward in studying and research, he might fall behind the standard of care as it is always evolving. One might also suggest that he may forget some of the knowledge he does not use quite as often. Thus for all medical professionals CMEs (Continued Medical Education) is required. You are not meant to keep the knowledge you graduate with and not continue to grow and review. If you fail to complete the CMEs required they will not renew your license. So while a job in the medical field would require the same: the need to build upon foundations and practice to move forward, failure to do so would in fact move back. 

Our faith is much more vast than the field of medicine, much more intricate that the study of the human body requires the same. How can it be bigger? Because faith encompasses all that there is in the natural and supernatural world. So while science and medicine are classifications of the natural world, we believe many things that fall outside of that realm in the supernatural world. With over 2000 years of history, over 30,000 denominations of just the Christian Faith and many other religions and cultures to learn about the amount of information is great. Yet, the Christian Faith can be understood in as simple of a manor as the Creed and yet we are called to continue to learn and grow. While no one is required CMEs for the faith, God calls us to run after Him more today than yesterday. More each day. 

The sentiment in our modern world though is not to think, not to ask and not to grow on a specific path. As Chesterton wrote "They say that choice is itself the divine thing."  The idea we can choose anything and everything and sentiments that there is not really truth, just relativism has made a world of those afraid to think, afraid to purse, afraid to take a stand. Chesterton explains that this comes from a new definition of humility. "The old humility was a spur that prevented a man from stopping; not a nail in his boot that prevented him from going on. For the old humility made a man doubtful about his efforts, which might make him work harder. But the new humility makes a man doubtful about his aims, which will make him stop working all together."  I saw this "new humility" as my husband and I searched for answers and for truth. We were told not to "think so much." "Don't take it so seriously." If the faith impacts all that we are and all that we do shouldn't we think about it? Shouldn't we ask questions and run forward? 

Friends don't buy the new humility of the world. Ask questions. Look for answers. Pray, practice and grow. Don't keep drinking the same milk friends. Try meat. 

<3

Anita 

A Screwtape For Those Considering Children

My affectionate Wormwood,

Did you hear what your charges were discussing? Reproducing! We can't let them think of doing such a thing.  They will inevitably want to share the enemy with their progeny as they seem to want to talk about him with everyone and their children will be no different. Raising children in their home ... of course the kids are bound to see and hear all the lies that these people spread. You need to get a good lead and I'm going to give you a few tips.

First, before they even make an attempt grip them with fear. If they aren't grasping that babies are a burden and nothing but trouble then remind them that with a baby they will never get to do anything they want to do. Make their outside activities, trips and fun seem so enticing that they won't want to give it up. Plant in her that her only worth is what she can do in a job outside the home and continue to let culture and the media tell her that motherhood is the most narrow and mindless thing she could do.  The enemy will try and teach them that motherhood is the greatest of vocations but don't let her believe that. Surround her with mothers who tell her that they "want their life back" so she can hear their experience. She will view this as trustworthy

If they do have children already, let them see more would be burdensome. Let the husband be afraid that he can't provide for another mouth to feed and don't let him think about sacrificing anything for his family. That we can't fight against once he decides to do it so please be careful.  Keep their current kids whining, and let them them think that the newborn will come out at this stage too. If the kids are older let them think the new baby would be too far apart and inevitably make their lives difficult. If you have to stress them that they won't be able to give enough love to the new baby and their current children as they are people that actually want to love their children this will make them think twice.  We have done a lot of work to embed birth control and abortion as mainstays. It's been tough but we have been successful. We have tricked them to thinking that contraception is safe and by and large they don't believe it when they hear that it allows a child to be conceived but not survive. They even believe that abortion is more about a woman's right to choose than the rights of her child. Amazing, I know.  If you can get her to take contraception, great-- but really push sterilization. Let her think fertility is a disease and you will easily sway her away from children.

If that doesn't work which is may not because if they are talking about children they have the strange idea that a baby would be a blessing, do whatever you can to make them busy. On the days they could actually conceive make sure they are too tired or not home or doing something. If they are home get a friend to call for dinner, have them think about errands they need to run. If that doesn't work attack their marriage. Let him say something incentive so she won't want to be intimate. If that doesn't work which it may not since they are close, let the wife think that her husband is no longer her ally or friend. This is tough but if you are diligent you can do it.  When they are too busy  or tired to be intimate let her think that he allows this because he doesn't really want kids. Plant seeds of deception. She won't want to push him or force him and so she will abandon the idea if you can turn her head.

If you can't distract them or separate them then you need to work fiercely to remind her that getting a perfect baby isn't easy and can involve a lot of sadness and pain for her. Remind her of all her friends who deal with infertility or miscarriage. Convince her because she cares about babies that this will inevitably happen to her and remind her of this with ever negative pregnancy test. Overwhelm her with fear so you can stress her body and make it harder to conceive.  If she struggles with infertility or a miscarriage convince her it's better not to try. Let her confuse mercy with fear and this will push her to not put herself and her husband through the pain that their attempts at having a baby could bring. Let her forget what true mercy and grace is and whatever you do don't let her remember that the enemy can work outside of time, diseases or circumstances. Let her think she is alone for if she asks from the enemy she will receive. Let the husband feel as though he can't possibly say anything right in these circumstances and let him say nothing. This will help her to feel alone and that's right where we are most successful.

Should you fail completely at least we will have another charge and you can even use these children to distract these two from the enemy and from each other.  Be on guard as this is a last resort.

Your Malevolent Uncle,

Screwtape

___________
The original Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis depict an older demon writing to a younger demon. It's a thought provoking and enjoyable read and I thought creating one would be fun. Just for clarification babies are precious, contraception does cause abortion, and babies are never a burden. For the mommies struggling with miscarriage, infertility, or simply the challenges of a TTC journey know that my heart and prayers are with you. While I kept the post concise I know there are many more things I could have touched on here and know that the most important thing I hope to share is not to lose hope. Our God is able to do much more than we can imagine. <3

-Anita

How Do You Make God The Center Of Your Business?

I was supposed to speak at a training this past week on how to keep God the center of your business. Now life happened: patients needed help and care and I was stuck. Don't get me wrong it wasn't stuck like stuck in mud, I'm privileged to care for patients but honestly I wanted to be able to keep my commitment and it didn't happen. My best efforts fell short and it was out of my control but I know God had a reason for not wanting me there.

Anyways I did a lot of thinking in preparation. Thinking, praying and of course talking about it with my husband. The more I thought and the more we discussed I found that "How do you keep God the center of your business?" was the wrong question. You see in phrasing it that way we are saying the business is the focus and how do we fit God in and around it. Ultimately no matter what we do we should first ask: How do I keep God the center of my life?

John 15:1-8

Jesus said to his disciples:
“I am the true vine, and my Father is the vine grower.
He takes away every branch in me that does not bear fruit,
and every one that does he prunes so that it bears more fruit.
You are already pruned because of the word that I spoke to you.
Remain in me, as I remain in you.
Just as a branch cannot bear fruit on its own
unless it remains on the vine,
so neither can you unless you remain in me.
I am the vine, you are the branches.
Whoever remains in me and I in him will bear much fruit,
because without me you can do nothing.
Anyone who does not remain in me
will be thrown out like a branch and wither;
people will gather them and throw them into a fire
and they will be burned.
If you remain in me and my words remain in you,
ask for whatever you want and it will be done for you.
By this is my Father glorified,
that you bear much fruit and become my disciples.”

You see without being connected to God we can't hope to accomplish and succeed what we would hope to. Not that if you connect to God your business will fore sure succeed as sometimes He is going to call you to other things. I will say though if you commit all your plans to the Lord He will guide you to what you should be doing and the timing you should be doing it in. 

Friends: are you asking the right questions? Are you asking how God can be the center of your work or school or life? Or are you letting God be the source and foundation of all you are and all you do? It's not easy friends. Pray and ask Him to show you how to make Him your guidepost. For without Him we can do nothing. Even good things done that aren't done for the glory of God are sinful. Let's honor and adore Him and when we don't know how let's ask Him to grow up and show us how. 

<3 

I WILL FOLLOW

Friends,
Chris Tomlin did a song: "I Will Follow"

"Where you go I'll go. Where you stay I'll stay. When you move I'll move. I will follow you"
These words I've sung countless times and it hit me today in the midst of a hectic day: Do I mean them? Do you?

I can think back over my life and think of lots of things I didn't plan on, didn't want and yet God worked on me, my heart and through various circumstances brought me to where I am.

I didn't want to finish my senior year of high school- I wanted to start college a year early. Had I not done that I wouldn't have earned a $20,000 scholarship and been named a Horatio Alger National Scholar. I wouldn't have gone to Washington on a trip that changed my life and I wouldn't have met some of the great people I met my freshmen year at FAU Honors.

I wanted to be a Physician Assistant starting my senior year of high school and yet during my senior year of college I took a detour to possibly get my PhD at FAU. A spur of the moment trip to Montreal showed me that isn't where God wanted me and I came back unsure of what was going to happen. A phone call changed everything and Orlando FL would become my home for 27 months. It isn't where I wanted to be but had I not gone there I wouldn't have met my husband.

The night I met Paul was at a concert I didn't want to go to. In fact the pew I sat in was because I didn't want to sit in a few other ones. If I hadn't gone I wouldn't be sitting next to my hubby as I write this.

At one point during our getting to know each other I tried to pray Paul out of my life. I was certain he would be a distraction from God and from school and so I tried to pray him away. The next day at church the message was "Don't Pray People Out of Your Life." Needless to say... He's my husband.

I didn't want to move but here I am in a different job than I moved for and I enjoy it even on the crazy days.  The timing for the changes was not my timing and honestly it has been amazing.

Of course the biggest things becoming Catholic was the last thing I wanted to be but when God called me to the church despite my biggest attempts I couldn't deny where He was leading me. It was honestly the last thing I wanted but now that I have come home to the Catholic church I know this was His plan and not mine. God really has helped me grow so much through my journey.

I don't know what else God has planned but I can tell you if you see anything in this litany is that I clearly and not the best judge of where I should be on the first go but where He leads I will follow.  Even when He leads me to the hard places, even on the long days.

Friends will you follow Him? Where He goes? Where He stays? When He moves?
I will follow. Will you?
Let's follow Him together <3

What is Natural Family Planning? FAQ and Answers

How did I end up doing NFP?

As a Physician Assistant student I learned that birth control "stops implantation." This BLEW my mind. As a newly married woman who was in the middle of the 27 months of educational experience they call PA school I honestly felt I could NOT get pregnant. I barely had time to eat, or sleep and with my clinical year starting 7 days after I got married I didn't think I could safely carry a child at the time. Moreover there was no way we could afford it. So a few months before we got married I went on birth control. I wasn't told anything just prescribed and given a years worth of refills. Sitting in the marathon of slides that is PA school's didactic year one stuck out during an OBGYN lecture. It was about birth control, listed the side effects including cancers, blood clots, weight gain, mood swings, etc. As I copied notes to help myself absorb the information and help me pay attention I found myself writing "Stops implantation." That night as I studied it hit me.... stops implantation...implantation of... a BABY...OH MY GOODNESS! It was if like a ton of bricks the reality hit me and honestly I thought I had jumped to conclusions and that I didn't have complete information so I spent HOURS that night ripping through the internet trying to find...is this true and was the "well it's only some birth controls" that I had heard passed around really true? I searched to find just ONE birth control that did not have abortifacient properties and I couldn't find one. All the package insert information that I could read online on the pharmaceutical companies websites listed in various words that it can affect a baby that is conceived from implanting. How? By starving and suffocating it though lessening blood supply that carries oxygen and sugar (food), by making it get to the uterus too early to implant and by thinning the lining so it physically can't implant.

Stunned I told my husband "we can't use this stuff" and I got no fight because God has been challenging his heart that maybe it wasn't best for no uncertain reason.

So newly married... no birth control.... growing up in a society that teaches unprotected sex leads to babies I knew we couldn't just "do nothing" or "wing it." So I researched. I studied. and through the rest of my most frequently asked questions on the topic I'm going to share what I learned.

Isn't NFP just doing nothing? isn't it the rhythm method?
NFP is NOT doing nothing - it's actually a process to learn.  It's not .... checking the calendar... (which essentially assumes every woman has a 28 day cycle and that we all ovulate on day 14 and simply abstains on that day) but is more fondly called Fertility Awareness Methods and provides through a various number of methods standard ways to monitor fertility. Some methods monitor cervical mucus, temperature, cervix position, use fertility monitors... and some use combinations of this.

What method do I use?
When I started I used Billings. It was easier to learn than some of the others and I failed to be able to take my temperature at the same time daily due to my changing rotations. I was not checking my cervix as I personally was not interested in that. Billings monitors cervical mucus only and through some guidelines helps you determine your fertile window. When trying to achieve pregnancy... go for the window and when your trying to avoid... keep the window closed. It's fairly simple in concept, takes some effort to learn and ultimately grows you in patience.

Now we are using Creighton which is a bit more specific than Billings but both are similar in that they monitor cervical mucus.

What about condoms? 
While from a medical standpoint condoms don't hurt you per say they don't help you unless your having multiple partners and at risk for STDs, they may help but not fully prevent infection. Even if you don't have a latex allergy, can handle the experience of a condom and have a husband who will use them...some things you may not know is it is healthier to not use one. (Note: I'm talking to people in committed monogamous relationships.) The female cervix actually absorbs sperm and this can be a natural antidepressant, and can help the female body learn to recognize the male DNA as "self" and some studies indicate this may lesson miscarriage. While there are tons of causes of miscarriage lessening the chance is always a good idea.

Ultimately though for us it boiled down to what was biblical and was not biblical. Genesis 38 starting in verse 8 tells the story of Onan. It says Onan spilled his semen on the ground. He interrupts sexual intercourse to prevent procreation. For Onan he was selfish. By Levirate law he marries his brothers widow and since he died without children (Deut. 25:5) by law the first born male would be considered the son of the deceased man. Onan by spilling his seed on the ground gets the dead man's property and his wife but if he has no children with her the property remains his. God didn't take that lightly and he struck Onan dead/ slew him also.  Now some will say that that Onan was struck dead not for "spilling his seed" but because he broke the law. However in Deuteronomy 25: 5-10 explains levirate law:  death wasn't the penalty for not taking your brothers wife and not having children. Simply: you handed over the sandal... meaning you lost the brothers property and there was great humiliation (someone might spit in your face).  So if it wasn't because Onan broke the law and refused to give children to his brothers name, than the only other thing he did was interrupt the marital act. Anything that interrupts the act then is not honoring to God. No pulling out, no condoms or other barrier methods. Marital intimacy is fully between a husband and wife. To be one flesh you can't have a piece of plastic between you. Just saying.

Keep in mind a compromise to birth control and NFP is NOT barrier methods. This isn't a meet in the middle spot. Note I'm not advocating for sex among the masses to be without condoms. Even Pope Benedict explained greater good on this issue. The lesser evil would be to prevent disease for those who are in HIV rampant areas or in Pope Benedict's example a male with HIV using a condom. In this case your protecting life first but ultimately using a condom is still sinful. In a monogamous marriage with no HIV or communicable disease there is no grave moral reason to use a condom.

Doesn't using NFP/not using any birth control mean you will end up with 19 kids?
No. God alone gives life. Ask any mommy who has tried for a baby and they will tell you they aren't "planned". Women who try for babies don't always get them and women who use condoms and birth control together sometimes end up pregnant. The conclusion then would not be to jump to contraception/sterilization with the idea "God will give me a baby if He wants." Yes God can give you a child despite your tubal ligation or birth control but to trust God fully means to trust Him with your fertility. That means being open to whatever He brings. Using NFP is a natural way to avoid pregnancy and while it is as or more effective than most birth controls when practiced properly we aren't doing anything to alter the marital act before, during or after. We leave marital intimacy whole every time. For us we have been using NFP for over 2 years and we have no children. We have avoided pregnancy with the understanding that if God gave us a baby we would be overjoyed.

If you have done NFP for over 2 years and have no children are you infertile?

Nope! My charts show that I have a fertile pattern.

If you use NFP to avoid does that mean you never have sex?
No!!! It just means during the fertile window when trying to avoid we abstain.

What if you don't have normal periods ? 
There is no "normal." There are general parameters but ultimately we all vary as we are all unique even down to our cycles. (And yes a cycle is not just a period. Every day for a woman is part of her fertility cycle).

Does NFP put everything on the woman?
No. NFP requires both spouses to be involved, and open to life. For us we weren't on the same page at first and it took a while to figure it out but ultimately we have grown closer and learned more about my health than we ever would have known on BC.

Why doesn't my OBGYN/ Family practice doctor know about this?
As a health care provider myself I tell you my patients teach me a lot so don't be afraid to share.  Having just educated my OBGYN that NFP is NOT just the rhythm method she was shocked even after medical school, a residency, and a fellowship. You see in allopathic medicine (MDs, PAs) we literally don't learn NFP. We learn birth control and we learn that people try the rhythm method and it doesn't work. No other information is taught in most program and training and unless someone shares or looks into it ...we don't know. The urge many times is to abandon the doctor because for those who do NFP many times it feels as though providers push birth control but a healthy conversation to explain that NFP is scientifically based can at least create an opportunity. That to be said there are wonderful NFP only providers and Naprotechnology doctors all over.

So when you say natural... what if you can't get pregnant?

There are many ways to naturally enhance pregnancy and promoting life is always a good thing. Some medications can help as well as specially trained professionals in Naprotechnology can offer options many OBGYNs don't as they honestly haven't been trained to do so. Invitro Fertilization does allow lives to be formed that do not survive and does separate the procreative process from the marital act. Anything that makes a baby without the natural marital act is well... not natural. For those attempting to be natural and to protect life these are not options. I could go into more of why but that would be a long response and good for another blog post. 

Does NFP take all the fun out of sex?

Nope. It takes away the selfishness of sex in my opinion but not the fun. However, the physical part of sex is only part of it and ultimately it isn't "just fun" it's fun and unitive, body and soul. 

What if you just had a baby and don't have a cycle? or have a medical condition where you don't have a cycle?

I would recommend you do the Creighton method and I know an awesome instructor that teaches over Skype. If you want her info shoot me any e-mail and I'll help you get connected. (note I don't get paid or anything to send you. But having had friends who went through that I know it can be hard and I wanna help you). 

As a PA if you don't believe in birth control do you prescribe it?

No. Personally I'm Catholic and as such prescribing it would be a mortal sin. I do not at this time work in a field though that would require me to prescribe it. 

Do you teach NFP?

I do- sort of. I am NOT a certified instructor in any method and I'll always refer to an expert but what I do is teach what I know, share resources and help encourage. I wish I would have had someone to talk to because honestly at the time I really didn't. 

Alright that's a lot of information for one post and a lot of things that could be covered more specifically that I shared a snapshot on. This isn't meant to be all inclusive but helps to answer the questions that I get most. Do you have more? Feel free to comment or e-mail me at beautifulgoodtrue@gmail.com . Honestly I'm happy to share and realize that some of this you may have never heard of and I'm happy to share/answer questions you may have. I'm not an expert I'm just sharing what I've learned and encourage you to research NFP, the methods and to truly pray and ask God to open your heart to the truth. The holy spirit will guide you as He did me because much of this was hard for me to be open to. I thought honestly no birth control = babies and that I needed "protection." I've learned I don't need to protect myself from my husband. He loves me freely, and fully. No need to protect from that.  I won't say it has always been easy but I will tell you it has been worth it and our marriage is closer now because of NFP. I am thankful for it and would recommend it even if you don't have religious implications for looking into it. 

<3

Anita