Anything by Jennie Allen is a book I just read in... 2 days. Honestly, it would have been faster had I not had to study. I'm on a committed reading kick and I want to get through the billion books I've been capturing from free downloads, and amazon 99 cent deals or just ones people have recommended. I brought the book to work and in between patients I read, and honestly thought to myself "why don't i cling to the bible like this?" My quick answer to myself was "your bible is too big to just flip open read a line and then go back to life" which... is true because I have a study bible, but i have the bible on my phone. It could be that the book spells it all out, while the bible makes me really think and have to decide what God is showing me. Ultimately, I learned I need to be in the word more. and the word is the Bible.
But--- it was a GREAT book! It really captured a lot of things in my heart and I honestly am still trying to process them. quick thoughts from it
1. my life is comfortable. despite the things it is missing compared to most of the world i'm living like royalty.
2. i'm so thankful for my husband
3. I can't want to have children
4. I have an idea what my "anything" is... but i'm still praying on it.
5. follow Jesus is costly but worth it.
6. I'm so far from having it all figured out and am so thankful that our God is gracious.
other thoughts:
- she makes a point that when we live radically for God we shock Christians more than anyone else. I believe that to be a truth....but a heartbreaking truth. that so many are signing on to saying they are a christian without even realizing that believing the writings of the bible and truly trusting Him were never meant to be separated. You are for Him or against Him but thats not what sells so instead people will only buy false gospels saying life will be without pain with Jesus. False. Life will still be painful it just will have purpose and the pain will stop when you leave the earth.
- I am a mess. wholeheartedly 100% straight up mess.
-again. I'm so thankful for my husband. How he loves me so much is amazing to me.
- Paul writes in ephesians asking for prayer that He would be able to fearlessly proclaim the mysteries of the gospel for which He is in chains. These verses have resonated with me for a while but I'm wondering how much more i need that prayer. Paul was so bold. I'm so full of insecurity and fear that I'm not bold about anything.
- what was God thinking putting me in charge of two women's groups. seriously. Definitely wasn't on my list of to do's and I still feel like I'm winging it. So thankful that God has it covered and is guiding my steps there because honestly I definitely couldn't do it without Him.
- I have some amazing friends. truly.
-
I've missed blogging.
"Do the things you once did" says the bible.
I once wrote. I once wrote all the time. I wrote a book, and another. I wrote many blogs and now I write this one. Ive written journals, letters to my husband, and cards. and something about my heart just opens up with words on a screen or a page and yet I don't do this enough. Not enough time....or rather complacency... or rather sometimes I just don't want to explore those real parts. Becoming like Jesus is a hard task and a painful one. I want my heart to be more like Mary's "Yes Lord, I'm your servant. whatever you want" (paraphrased). She knew it would cost her everything, but she didn't care.
I guess what I'm saying is I'm hesitant to truly share with people, but I'm sometimes even afraid to share with myself. And yet I'm not the only one. I have women who tell me they are afraid to pray. I thank God that He loves me enough to break me into someone who has to pray to survive each day. I definitely need to start opening up my prayer life more. I'm miss sunday night prayer group. A lot.
and this... has been the most unplanned, unstructured and rambling blog but truly...it's all things floating around in my head.
I think I'll leave it here.
Sorry this might be purposeless but this one is just for me.
praying for you friends. <3
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment