Sunday, June 15, 2014

Those Graphic Pictures of Abortion Made Me Pro-Life

I remember growing up in a southern baptist church  and I was more than just a Sunday attender. Anytime the doors were open I was there until through middle school and then I started going to a non-denominational church and Lutheran church (different youth group activities) in high school. I knew what abortion was, that they terminated a pregnancy, but I had no idea how they did it. I remember telling people "I would never have an abortion, but I could see why other people might do it."

My sophomore year of college at Florida Atlantic University there was a big commotion on the free speech lawn. All these huge banners were everywhere with pictures of bloody mini body parts over quarters and dimes. I remember standing there in awe. I couldn't' believe they were allowed to put this up, but moreover, I couldn't believe that this had been done. These tiny hands and feet and faces ripped into pieces. It broke my heart. I wanted to know who would do this and why? Reading a pamphlet they handed out this wasn't what I thought. See I thought maybe this was some injustice being done on the other side of the world in some poor savage country... but it wasn't. It was right here in the US this happens and it's called abortion. See it was the first time I learned that ending a pregnancy ended a baby. My churches never taught me and I wish I could tell you why it was never preached on. My family never talked about it but I think it is because they all knew it was wrong and maybe assumed I did too, I don't know. What I do know is the clicking of this is nothing someone had to explain to me. These parts were parts of babies and babies are precious. There is no good reason to rip them apart.

The pictures of these babies now break my heart. It breaks my heart that we aren't saving them. That we aren't supporting these women who are pregnant and loving them and caring for them and taking them in and providing for them but leaving them to deal with it on their own and that these women many times in desperation turn to this. For some it's out of fear: fear of a baby ruining their life, their finances, their dreams, but when we did we become a culture that allowed child sacrifice for the sake of fear.

I now see my logic of "I would never have one but you can" is terrible. Can you imagine if people started saying "I would never kill my wife but I would never stop someone else from doing it." Or " I would never kill my newborn but I wouldn't stop you from doing it." It is a statement of apathy. Of a willingness to be relative so that we don't offend anyone. Unfortunately, murder is offensive and life is the first inalienable right. Abortion kills a baby and wounds a woman, I wouldn't do it and I wouldn't want that to happen to anyone else no matter the circumstances.

In December of last year a friend on Facebook posted that an abortion clinic was coming to Osceola County. In March exactly where it was going became the forefront of knowledge and while at lunch at a local restaurant my husband and I learned about a city commission meeting coming up regarding this. I sat as we listened to Mayor Swan promise that there was nothing they could do, but if they could they would. I listened as doctors and citizens young and old shared with the commission that Kissimmee is a place for family and that this was not going to grow family. In the past several months I've found myself outside of the proposed site of Planned Parenthood Kissimmee overwhelmed with what could go on this building if we can't stop them.

Now as I stand and pray outside of 610 Oak Commons in Kissimmee FL I picture those banners from my sophomore year. I picture those babies being torn apart. I picture those moms coming looking for answers and 93.8% of these babies dying (according to PPGO annual report from 2012).Those opposed think I'm not for women and their rights but I am. I'm for women, I'm for babies. I'm for life. Our women deserve better than this. Our children deserve better than this.




Please friends be praying as the next few weeks are very important in our fight to stop Planned Parenthood. Please come to the City Commission Meeting at City Hall on Tuesday June 17th at 6 pm to ask the city to join us in coming up with alternatives to abortion.

Some might think I'm fanatical about this, but this is life or death for these babies. It's not just a cause to ask you to donate to but rather I'm asking you to just pray. Pray that we can save the babies and support the mothers.  I would hope that someone would fight for me and my life and the life of my child. I'm thankful my mom chose life and I pray that I can help other mommies choose life. If your pregnant and you don't want your baby please let me help you. Please let me care for your child or find someone who you feel comfortable with. Please let me help connect you to people who can help you like the JMJ pregnancy center or another in your area. Please let me pray for you and please know that your not alone.

Below is how they abortion a 23 week old baby. This is shocking to me, and heart breaking. Perhaps if more knew how they did it, more people would be Pro-Life.


Thursday, June 12, 2014

I Can't Separate My Beliefs From My Medical Practice

If I were to introduce myself I would tell you my name is Anita and I'm a physician assistant. If you don't know what that is it's a member of the health care team that can diagnose, and treat medical conditions just like a doctor would, but we work as part of a team. We work with our doctors, we help fill the need and the gap.  As a PA I can take care of people, and I find that I am less involved in the business side of medicine. I love it but it has it's challenges.

What I might not say in my introductory sentence is that I'm also a christian. Being a christian greatly affects the way I practice medicine. I once was asked to separate my medical practice from my christian beliefs to which I had to say "I can't. I am trying to be kind to my patients, because God gives grace to the humble and He opposes the proud. I try to love my patients because God loves me and calls me to love others. I work hard because scripture tells me to work like I'm working for the Lord. So no I can't separate my beliefs from my practice." I have to tell you God definitely helped me with the words on that one because I wanted to say "what? is that really a suggestion?" God gave me grace and patience and love in that moment that I needed and so often He helps me with my patients. 

He helps me to comfort the man who's wife is in the hospital with Alzheimer's and she dying from what I don't know what as I ask him how He's doing and with a cracked voice he says "I don't cry" it's my heart that breaks. 

It's the man who comes in and has no one. He told me how his wife died and he drives around with her ashes in the passenger seat. I met him during my clinical year and I still pray for him because it took everything I had to hold in tears during that visit. It's God that helped break my heart for a man I never met. 

It's the lady who is living in a hotel because she can't afford anything and makes too little on social security to qualify for subsidized housing (yes you read that right so makes too little) and she's telling me that she doesn't understand how God can't see she needs help. It's the words He gives me to share with her that He hasn't forgotten her but loves her and has a plan. 

It's the woman who tells me the reason she is sick is because she doesn't believe enough, because she's been told the lie that if you have enough faith you won't hurt. It's having the courage to share the truth with her:  Jesus had more faith than anyone and He hurt. He cried. He sweat blood. It's not a lack of faith that causes illness. It's having faith despite illness that makes you strong. 

It's the girl who is full of anxiety because she's been treated like garbage by too many people and it impacts her daily life. She's not a christian, but will listen to me encourage her and says thank you when I tell you I'm praying for her. It's a thank you that's genuine, and the visit I forgot to tell her she asked me if I still pray for her which let me know even those who don't believe in God don't mind if I talk to Him for them. 

It's fighting for my patient, when someone else finds it easy to walk away. It's the specialists, and insurance peer to peers and the pharmacy calls, and the staying late that I do because I want to take care of people the way the Great Physician would if He had my job. 

It's the patient that I find difficult to be patient with, who at the end thanks me for being so kind. It breaks my heart knowing that I wasn't kind in my heart and her words feel like knives. It teaches me. 

It's the woman who says there is no way she is pregnant short of a miracle because she has PCOS and has tried for years.... and I get to share tears of joy that she is pregnant and it's not a stomach bug! It's God that helped me encourage her and has me still praying for that baby.

See it's my beliefs that make me the provider that cares about her patients more than I ever could on my own. It's the Holy Spirit that helps soften my heart and mold me to be the type of provider that isn't afraid to connect. It's God who helps me ask the woman in my office what she means when she says "things are tough my son" instead of avoiding it to keep a short appointment. 

It's God that helps me to keep integrity, to stand up for the truth no matter how uncomfortable and to  treat my patients like they are family. I've worked hard to learn names and not refer to people as "the guy with melanoma" or "the lady in room 2." I'm not perfect at it, but God has helped me. 

It's evident He helps me in the test I think to order that I've never ordered, but suddenly a moment from my clinical year floods my mind and I find myself doing the right thing. It's Him helping me with the radiology report that says "repeat in 3 months" for the CT, instead I do a PET scan going with my gut and it's positive for cancer. 

I wish I could tell you I am loving, kind and patient with each of the people I care for but I'm not. I fail. I get stressed about being on time, and get impatient and forget to do things, forget to call and ask how the patient I sent to the ER ended up doing, but I'm growing. I'm learning and I'm trying so much to let my beliefs shape how I care about people because it is only then that I will be a good provider. 

I pray that God continues to shape me and continues to help me love people. I pray He continues to help me uphold the oath I took to do no harm, and helps me to be humble enough to admit when I've made a mistake. I pray that He helps me to stand strong despite challenges that come with being a christian provider and that He will help me to trust that all of the people He puts in my care are His patients and I'm just is helper. 

There are patients I can do nothing for but pray for and that's a lot.

No one told me this but I've learned: no matter what area of medicine you go into your not just a persons medical provider, so often your their counselor too. It's God that helps me when they ask me the tough questions: why do bad things happen to me? why did God allow this? why did God forget me? Why did they hurt my son? Why did my husband die? Why did my insurance get canceled? Why did my disability get denied? It's these questions and more that I am so thankful that God helps me admit when I don't know and share what I do. 

No one told me that there would be challenges to maintain and have integrity, or to stand up for life but God has given me the strength and worked out the details. I won't go into all those challenges in this post but know that if your being challenged to keep your beliefs at work your not alone. It might be in a big way, or a small way, but don't give up!! :)

So friends, if your in the health care field don't separate your beliefs from your medical practice. I don't talk about God in every patient room, but I use the love He has shown me to love and encourage my patients to steward their health, to offer up their suffering, to not take their family for granted, to find joy, to trust that it will all work out in time and to know that even the ones I have to help sign up for Hospice are encouraged that life is beautiful and each day is a gift no matter what that day looks like.

If your a patient somewhere look for a provider who cares, who spends time, who listens and who looks at you and not just the computer screen. Know that your provider is a person too and don't forget to encourage them, they might need it. Maybe you can show God's love to your doctor who doesn't know Him because we can't tell patients not to talk about things :)

Friends no matter what your job: work like your working for the Lord. Love People. Love God. Show the world the beauty of the christian faith as they will never see it as good or true if they don't believe it's beautiful.



I'm sure it's a challenge to be a christian in any field. What are some of the challenges you face? How do you get through them?

<3
Anita

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Is the Eucharist Scriptural or Just a Tradition?

Since I posted my conversion story (here) and since I started telling people I was becoming Catholic, I've been asked many times questions that involve the same topic:
Why? What's the difference? How did you have your first communion when you became Catholic when you grew up baptist? What's the biggest difference between Catholics and Protestants? What is the Eucharist? How did you come to believe Jesus was really present in the Eucharist?

Those questions are a small sample of what I've been asked...but probably the most important question has been: Where is scripture does it say Jesus is present in the Eucharist? This was my question. I didn't care if 2000 years of tradition said it was Jesus, I came from a Protestant church and it had to be in the bible for me to believe it. Now I know the church came before the bible, the church put together the bible and determined what letters were inspired and what weren't but at the time of me studying about the Eucharist the bible was the only authority I would submit to and the bible led me to believe the tradition and the Church. (Note 1 Timothy 3:15 claims that the Church is the foundation and pillar of Truth, the bible never claims to be the authority but the Catholic Church does not teach anything contrary to scripture. )

So to understand we would have to go back to some of my first mass experiences. I had agreed to go to mass, because at the time I felt that the protestant church I couldn't go to - they didn't stand up for the unborn, they can't agree on doctrines and they are all founded on the bible and led by the Holy Spirit but going in different directions. I love my protestant friends and I wanted to go to protestant churches just to be with them but if I was to be obedient to where God was leading me I would have to at least consider the Catholic church. That to be said- I was determined to find something wrong with the Catholic Church....so I was considering it with a bias. If I could find something wrong well then at least I could go anywhere because they were all wrong.

Many things aren't divisive in the catholic church. They believe in Jesus, they care for the poor, the believe in charity, they have a hierarchy but so do many churches, they love babies, they believe in eternal life.... none of this was that crazy or outside of what I believed just maybe they explained some of it a little more. What I couldn't understand was the Eucharist. My husband told me "It remakes present the sacrifice of Christ." to which I heard "They are re-sacrificing Jesus?!?!! Don't they know Hebrews says that His sacrifice was once and for all. Heretics." ...And I was ready to leave it at that. See I didn't actually want to know the truth I wanted to believe what I wanted to believe. But the more I prayed the more I felt God really challenging me at least to know why I don't believe the Eucharist. So I began researching it and reading whatever I could.

I did a post a while ago on the historical writings about the Eucharist. Here. 

I want to go through Scriptural support in this post. Brace yourself. I'll try and be concise but it might be long.

1 Corinthians 10:16 The cup of blessing which we bless, is it not a communion in the blood of Christ? The bread which we break is it not a communion in the body of Christ? 

This verse baffled me. Paul writes that it is a communion which means coming together to 1. He didn't write that we are in communion with each other when we do it, nor did he write that when we do it to call it communion. He said is it not a communion in the blood of Christ? Is it not a communion in the body of Christ? He says this as if it were obvious. Remember the new testament was written for Christians.

1 Corinthians 5:7-8 Christ our Passover lamb has been sacrificed. Therefore let us keep the feast! 

Here Paul recounts that Christ is our Passover lamb but what does that even mean? If we look back in scripture to Exodus we see the Passover instituted:


The Passover Ritual Prescribed.

1The LORD said to Moses and Aaron in the land of Egypt:2 This month will stand at the head of your calendar; you will reckon it the first month of the year.3 Tell the whole community of Israel: On the tenth of this month every family must procure for itself a lamb, one apiece for each household.4 If a household is too small for a lamb, it along with its nearest neighbor will procure one, and apportion the lamb’s cost in proportion to the number of persons, according to what each household consumes.5Your lamb must be a year-old male and without blemish. You may take it from either the sheep or the goats.6You will keep it until the fourteenth day of this month, and then, with the whole community of Israel assembled, it will be slaughtered during the evening twilight.7 They will take some of its blood and apply it to the two doorposts and the lintel of the houses in which they eat it.8They will consume its meat that same night, eating it roasted with unleavened bread and bitter herbs.9Do not eat any of it raw or even boiled in water, but roasted, with its head and shanks and inner organs.10You must not keep any of it beyond the morning; whatever is left over in the morning must be burned up.

11This is how you are to eat it: with your loins girt, sandals on your feet and your staff in hand, you will eat it in a hurry. It is the LORD’s Passover.12 For on this same night I will go through Egypt, striking down every firstborn in the land, human being and beast alike, and executing judgment on all the gods of Egypt—I, the LORD!13 But for you the blood will mark the houses where you are. Seeing the blood, I will pass over you; thereby, when I strike the land of Egypt, no destructive blow will come upon you

14This day will be a day of remembrance for you, which your future generations will celebrate with pilgrimage to the LORD; you will celebrate it as a statute forever.15For seven days you must eat unleavened bread. From the very first day you will have your houses clear of all leaven. For whoever eats leavened bread from the first day to the seventh will be cut off from Israel.16On the first day you will hold a sacred assembly, and likewise on the seventh. On these days no sort of work shall be done, except to prepare the food that everyone needs.17Keep, then, the custom of the unleavened bread, since it was on this very day that I brought your armies out of the land of Egypt. You must observe this day throughout your generations as a statute forever.18From the evening of the fourteenth day of the first month until the evening of the twenty-first day of this month you will eat unleavened bread.19For seven days no leaven may be found in your houses; for anyone, a resident alien or a native, who eats leavened food will be cut off from the community of Israel.20You shall eat nothing leavened; wherever you dwell you may eat only unleavened bread.

Promulgation of the Passover.
21 Moses summoned all the elders of Israel and said to them, “Go and procure lambs for your families, and slaughter the Passover victims.22 Then take a bunch of hyssop, and dipping it in the blood that is in the basin, apply some of this blood to the lintel and the two doorposts. And none of you shall go outdoors until morning.23For when the LORD goes by to strike down the Egyptians, seeing the blood on the lintel and the two doorposts, the LORD will pass over that door and not let the destroyer come into your houses to strike you down.

24“You will keep this practice forever as a statute for yourselves and your descendants.25Thus, when you have entered the land which the LORD will give you as he promised, you must observe this rite.26 When your children ask you, ‘What does this rite of yours mean?’27you will reply, ‘It is the Passover sacrifice for the LORD, who passed over the houses of the Israelites in Egypt; when he struck down the Egyptians, he delivered our houses.’” Then the people knelt and bowed down,28and the Israelites went and did exactly as the LORD had commanded Moses and Aaron.

So some important things to point out: 

1. A lamb without blemish was to be sacrificed. 1 Peter 1:19 " but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect."
2. They were to paint the doorposts ( note growing up all I remember learning about was this part...not number 3). Ephesians 1:7 In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace-
3.They were to eat the lamb and God spent a lot of time explaining how and where and to eat it. 1 Corinthians 5:7-8 Christ our Passover lamb has been sacrificed. Therefore let us keep the feast! 
4. This day will be a remembrance - 1 Corinthians 23:26 23 For I received from the Lord what I also delivered to you, that the Lord Jesus on the night when he was betrayed took bread, 24 and when he had given thanks, he broke it, and said, “This is my body which is for  you. Do this in remembrance of me.” 25 In the same way also the cup, after supper, saying, “This cup is the new covenant in my blood. Do this, as often as you drink it, in remembrance of me.” 26 For as often as you eat this bread and drink the cup, you proclaim the Lord’s death until he comes.

Now I would have given you 1, 2, and 4 as a protestant but number 3 I would have said... well thats just crazy until I read what Paul said in Corinthians in the aforementioned verses. This wasn't enough to convince me though. 

In the old testament I found: 


Leviticus 7:15: The meat of the thanksgiving communion sacrifice shall be eaten on the day it is offered; none of it may be kept until morning. 
- According to levitical law Aaronic sacrifices had to be eaten to bring you in to full communion with God. Christ is our sacrifice.
Nehemiah 9:15- 15 For their hunger you gave them bread from heaven, and for their thirst you brought water for them out of the rock, and you told them to go in to possess the land that you swore to give them. - God provided for them bread from Heaven. - Jesus is the bread of heaven (john 6)
Psalm 78:24-25 24 he rained down on them manna to eat, and gave them the grain of heaven. 25 Mortals ate of the bread of angels; he sent them food in abundance.- Jesus is the bread of Heaven (john 6).
Ezekiel 2:8-10; 3:1-3 8 But you, mortal, hear what I say to you; do not be rebellious like that rebellious house; open your mouth and eat what I give you. 9 I looked, and a hand was stretched out to me, and a written scroll was in it. 10 He spread it before me; it had writing on the front and on the back, and written on it were words of lamentation and mourning and woe.; 3 He said to me, O mortal, eat what is offered to you; eat this scroll, and go, speak to the house of Israel. 2 So I opened my mouth, and he gave me the scroll to eat. 3 He said to me, Mortal, eat this scroll that I give you and fill your stomach with it. Then I ate it; and in my mouth it was as sweet as honey. - Ezekiel was to eat the word of God which in John 1:1 we see Jesus is the Word of God.

and several more. Honestly if I listed all the eucharistic foreshadowing the post would be infinitely long.

To go through all the scripture of the new testament... I'd have to write out almost the whole new testament but I think it can be summarized into John 6 and then explaining some of the misnomers about John 6:


The Bread from Heaven

22 The next day the crowd that had stayed on the other side of the lake saw that there had been only one boat there. They also saw that Jesus had not got into the boat with his disciples, but that his disciples had gone away alone. 23 Then some boats from Tiberias came near the place where they had eaten the bread after the Lord had given thanks.24 So when the crowd saw that neither Jesus nor his disciples were there, they themselves got into the boats and went to Capernaum looking for Jesus.

25 When they found him on the other side of the lake, they said to him, ‘Rabbi, when did you come here?’ 26 Jesus answered them, ‘Very truly, I tell you, you are looking for me, not because you saw signs, but because you ate your fill of the loaves. 27 Do not work for the food that perishes, but for the food that endures for eternal life, which the Son of Man will give you. For it is on him that God the Father has set his seal.’ 28 Then they said to him, ‘What must we do to perform the works of God?’ 29 Jesus answered them, ‘This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.’ 30 So they said to him, ‘What sign are you going to give us then, so that we may see it and believe you? What work are you performing? 31 Our ancestors ate the manna in the wilderness; as it is written, “He gave them bread from heaven to eat.”’ 32 Then Jesus said to them, ‘Very truly, I tell you, it was not Moses who gave you the bread from heaven, but it is my Father who gives you the true bread from heaven. 33 For the bread of God is that which comes down from heaven and gives life to the world.’ 34 They said to him, ‘Sir, give us this bread always.’

35 Jesus said to them, ‘I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty. 36 But I said to you that you have seen me and yet do not believe. 37 Everything that the Father gives me will come to me, and anyone who comes to me I will never drive away; 38 for I have come down from heaven, not to do my own will, but the will of him who sent me. 39 And this is the will of him who sent me, that I should lose nothing of all that he has given me, but raise it up on the last day. 40 This is indeed the will of my Father, that all who see the Son and believe in him may have eternal life; and I will raise them up on the last day.’

41 Then the Jews began to complain about him because he said, ‘I am the bread that came down from heaven.’ 42 They were saying, ‘Is not this Jesus, the son of Joseph, whose father and mother we know? How can he now say, “I have come down from heaven”?’ 43 Jesus answered them, ‘Do not complain among yourselves. 44 No one can come to me unless drawn by the Father who sent me; and I will raise that person up on the last day. 45 It is written in the prophets, “And they shall all be taught by God.” Everyone who has heard and learned from the Father comes to me. 46 Not that anyone has seen the Father except the one who is from God; he has seen the Father. 47 Very truly, I tell you, whoever believes has eternal life. 48 I am the bread of life. 49 Your ancestors ate the manna in the wilderness, and they died. 50 This is the bread that comes down from heaven, so that one may eat of it and not die. 51 I am the living bread that came down from heaven. Whoever eats of this bread will live for ever; and the bread that I will give for the life of the world is my flesh.’

52 The Jews then disputed among themselves, saying, ‘How can this man give us his flesh to eat?’ 53 So Jesus said to them, ‘Very truly, I tell you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. 54 Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood have eternal life, and I will raise them up on the last day; 55 for my flesh is true food and my blood is true drink. 56 Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood abide in me, and I in them. 57 Just as the living Father sent me, and I live because of the Father, so whoever eats me will live because of me. 58 This is the bread that came down from heaven, not like that which your ancestors ate, and they died. But the one who eats this bread will live for ever.’ 59 He said these things while he was teaching in the synagogue at Capernaum.

The Words of Eternal Life

60 When many of his disciples heard it, they said, ‘This teaching is difficult; who can accept it?’ 61 But Jesus, being aware that his disciples were complaining about it, said to them, ‘Does this offend you? 62 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? 63 It is the spirit that gives life; the flesh is useless. The words that I have spoken to you are spirit and life. 64 But among you there are some who do not believe.’ For Jesus knew from the first who were the ones that did not believe, and who was the one that would betray him. 65 And he said, ‘For this reason I have told you that no one can come to me unless it is granted by the Father.’
66 Because of this many of his disciples turned back and no longer went about with him.67 So Jesus asked the twelve, ‘Do you also wish to go away?’ 68 Simon Peter answered him, ‘Lord, to whom can we go? You have the words of eternal life. 69 We have come to believe and know that you are the Holy One of God.70 Jesus answered them, ‘Did I not choose you, the twelve? Yet one of you is a devil.’ 71 He was speaking of Judas son of Simon Iscariot,[i] for he, though one of the twelve, was going to betray him.

---------

Now let me say right now I could do an entire post on just John 6 and one day I might, but it was reading and praying over this passage that led me to all the other verses. It was asking God to show me what this meant. God taught me a lot and I'll make some quick points about it.

1. Manna is the prefiguring of Christ in the Eucharist. 
Manna is the bread of heaven, the bread of angels and in Jewish tradition it was rained down from heaven from the heavenly temple to the ground.  (Exodus 16 describes this) This bread fed the Israelites as they wandered in the dessert for 40 years and was so special to them they kept it in the tabernacle.  Manna actually comes from the word " man hu" meaning "what is it?".  It was a miraculous bread from heaven that they couldn't explain. It was a miracle. Remember back in Psalm 78 God commanded the doors of heaven to open and he gave the bread of angels.  This manna was so special they kept it in the tabernacle with the 10 commandments and the Rod of Aaron. The Jews had obligation to see the face of God and they fulfilled this by lifting the Manna up on a table and visiting the bread of Heaven. As I learned more I realized how close this is to the Eucharist, where catholics each day go and visit Christ in the Eucharist in adoration and consume Him at mass. It was amazing to me how Jesus fulfilled the promise of the Manna in the old testament and then met the Jews requests John 6:31-34 "31 Our ancestors ate the manna in the wilderness; as it is written, “He gave them bread from heaven to eat.”’ 32 Then Jesus said to them, ‘Very truly, I tell you, it was not Moses who gave you the bread from heaven, but it is my Father who gives you the true bread from heaven. 33 For the bread of God is that which comes down from heaven and gives life to the world.’ 34 They said to him, ‘Sir, give us this bread always.’"

2. Jesus was very clear He was not speaking symbolically. If you read the first 5 chapters of John each time Jesus says something that people don't understand and they misquote, misunderstand or misspeak He corrects them. In John 6 however, Jesus doesn't leave any room for interpretation:

48 I am the bread of life. 49 Your ancestors ate the manna in the wilderness, and they died. 50 This is the bread that comes down from heaven, so that one may eat of it and not die. 51 I am the living bread that came down from heaven. Whoever eats of this bread will live for ever; and the bread that I will give for the life of the world is my flesh.’52 The Jews then disputed among themselves, saying, ‘How can this man give us his flesh to eat?’ 53 So Jesus said to them, ‘Very truly, I tell you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. 54 Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood have eternal life, and I will raise them up on the last day; 55 for my flesh is true food and my blood is true drink. 56 Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood abide in me, and I in them. 57 Just as the living Father sent me, and I live because of the Father, so whoever eats me will live because of me. 58 This is the bread that came down from heaven, not like that which your ancestors ate, and they died. But the one who eats this bread will live for ever.’

Verse 55 tore my heart and soul apart" For my flesh is true food and my blood is true drink." I couldn't find anyway to twist that into "symbolic" or "possibly not true." But it was my next point that I think really drove home the point.

3. Jesus again, was very clear. John 6:60-69:

60 When many of his disciples heard it, they said, ‘This teaching is difficult; who can accept it?’ 61 But Jesus, being aware that his disciples were complaining about it, said to them, ‘Does this offend you? 62 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? 63 It is the spirit that gives life; the flesh is useless. The words that I have spoken to you are spirit and life. 64 But among you there are some who do not believe.’ For Jesus knew from the first who were the ones that did not believe, and who was the one that would betray him. 65 And he said, ‘For this reason I have told you that no one can come to me unless it is granted by the Father.’
66 Because of this many of his disciples turned back and no longer went about with him.67 So Jesus asked the twelve, ‘Do you also wish to go away?’ 68 Simon Peter answered him, ‘Lord, to whom can we go? You have the words of eternal life. 69 We have come to believe and know that you are the Holy One of God.

---
So Just as in the first 5 chapters of John there is a clarification asked for "This teaching is difficult; who can accept it?" Can you imagine? Your Jewish and Jesus just told you to eat His flesh and His blood. You know you can't drink blood thats against the law, and eat His flesh? He must be crazy or He must be establishing a new covenant. He doesn't even say "Yea thats what I meant I'll give you time to soak it in. He's bold He says "Does this offend you? Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before?" And we know He does ascend (see Acts 1:6-12). It's amazing how He responded and it changes everything. He didn't correct himself. He didn't say it was a symbol. In fact He says "The words that I have spoken to you are spirit and life." No where in the bible is the

Spirit symbolic. The people knew He wasn't joking or lying or speaking in code because what did they do ? They turned their backs and no longer went about with Him. They left Him! So He turned to the 12 and said "Do you wish to go away?" It's as if He was challenging them: you leaving too? I'm not backing down on this one. But Peter beautifully says "lord to whom can we go? you have the words of eternal life. We have come to believe and know you are the Holy One of God."


It's only possible for Christ to be present in the Eucharist through God. Through a miracle. If he wasn't God it would just be bread and wine. But God can do anything including turn bread and wine into the body and blood of Christ and He does each day in the Catholic church.

4. Jesus taught them to pray for this:

Matthew 6:9-13
‘Pray then in this way:
Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name.
10 Your kingdom come.
Your will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
11 Give us this day our daily bread.
12 And forgive us our trespasses
as we forgive those who trespass against us
13 And lead us not to temptation but deliver us from evil

Give us this day our daily bread. What does that mean? Am I asking for the steak I hope to have for dinner? Am I asking for the cheerios that I had this morning? Am I asking just that God would provide food and drink in the midst of praying for so many spiritual matters?

1. Gods will
2. FOOD?
3. Forgiveness
4 Grace
5 Protection from sin
6. Protection from Satan.

For me number 2 in this list just never seemed to add up. The word in the greek for daily is epiousios. Epi means on or above. Ousia means "being substance or nature" So Epiousios is most closely : Supernatural or Supersubstantial.

This isn't a new idea of this either. For example:

Saint Cyril, bishop of Jerusalem (313-386) wrote " Common bread is not super substantial, but this Holy Bread is supersubstancial"

So how much more does this list fit for what we pray for?

1. God's Will
2. Christ's presence.
3. forgiveness
4. grace
5 protection from Sin
6. protection from Satan

For me there was no denying this. I couldn't twist my way out of it. I couldn't find one verse that said "Communion is symbolic," or even one word that I could take out of context to say that.

I'm sure there will be a lot of comments but the ones I've come across in conversation:
1. "Isn't Jesus speaking about Him Spiritually being in Eucharist not Physically?

Paul wrote: 1 Corinthians 10:16: The cup of blessing which we bless, is it not a communion in the blood of Christ? The bread which we break is it not a communion in the body of Christ?

2. "Jesus says He is a lot of things: a door, a vine, ect. So how do you know He's being literal?" 

As I spoke above He is pretty clear in John 6 that He is literal, but we can see that He is not literal in the various other places He calls himself a door or a vine.

in John 15 He calls himself the Vine. No one asks Him if He is literally the vine as they do in John 6.
In John 10 He calls himself the door but again no one asks Him if He is literally the door as they do in John 6.

They know He isn't kidding or speaking metaphorically in John 6 and they quiz Him on it, they walk away from Him because He is serious.

The most important thing is to remember Luke 1:37: For with God Nothing is Impossible
God definitely has the power to do this miracle and it is so beautiful.

3. "You believe in re-sacrificing Jesus? don't you know He was sacrificed once for the forgiveness of sins"

This was a struggle for me. Hebrews is clear the sacrifice is complete, and catholics would agree. The mass however is a sacrifice in that it remakes present that sacrifice, meaning we have the presence of the sacrificed lamb through a miracle of the Holy Spirit. Now remember the jews were to put the blood of the lamb on the doorposts and eat the lamb. The mass is called an "unbloody" sacrifice meaning we aren't re-killing Jesus. That's what it means when the Catechism says "the sacrifice of Christ and the sacrifice of the Eucharist are one single sacrifice." That's also why the Eucharist is termed the "unbloody Sacrifice," because the bloodshed was in the slaying of the Lamb, not the eating. In the Eucharist the Church is as it were at the foot of the cross with Mary, united with the offering and intercession of Christ. Catechism-1370. Catholics are not repeating the sacrifice of Christ but rather celebrating that He offers Himself on our behalf for eternity to the Father. It is because the death of the lamb was sufficient that we celebrate the Eucharist.

Protestant early church historian J.N.D Kelly writes that in the early church "the Eucharist was regarded as the distinctively Christian sacrifice...Malachi's prediction (1:10-11) that the Lord would reject Jewish sacrifices and instead would have a "pure offering" made to him by the Gentiles in every place was seized upon by Christians as a prophecy of the Eucharist. Didache indeed actually applies the term thusia, or sacrifice to the Eucharist... It was natural for early Christians to think of the Eucharist as a sacrifice. The fulfillment of prophecy demanded a solemn Christian offering, and the rite itself was wrapped in the sacrificial atmosphere with which our Lord invested the Last Supper. The words of institution "Do this" (touto poieiete), must have been charged with sacrificial overtones for second-century ears; Justin at any rate understood them to mean "Offer this"... The bread and wine moreover are offered "for a memorial (eis anamnasin)of the passion." a phrase which in view of his identification of them with the Lord's body and blood implies much more than an act of purely spiritual recollection (Early Christian Doctrines 196-97)

When I was part of various parts of the protestant church I could never understand how Jesus was to be everything for me. I could understand how He could fulfill me spiritually but being such physical people there was no physical way to connect with Christ. Now that I'm Catholic, I can physically encounter Christ through the Eucharist. Christ promises to never leave us, to be with us to the end of the age and He is, both Physically in the Eucharist and Spiritually. How beautiful. It's a miracle that it turns in to the true flesh and true blood of our Lord Jesus Christ through a miracle of the Holy Spirit.

In the Eucharist is contained His body,blood, soul and divinity and it's to that Catholic kneel, bow, and genuflect.






I know this is a lot to take in and you might have questions. Don't hesitate to comment or e-mail me at beautifulgoodtrue@gmail.com


God bless you.
Love,
Anita





Wednesday, May 28, 2014

I was Married, Confirmed and had my 1st Communion all on the same day.

On May 17th 2014 I had one of the biggest days of my life. 
At 3 PM Paul and I had our marriage concelebrated in the catholic church.
At 430 I was Confirmed and brought into full communion.
3 sacraments. 1 day. An amazing day of graces. 

But had you told me even a year ago that this is what I would be doing with my Saturday...I wouldn't have believed you. If you told me you did these things a year ago I would have not understood why in the world you would consider that an important day as joining a new church for me consisted of simply walking in and saying hello. As a protestant I never, ever wanted to be catholic. If you haven't read about how I got here please do so here.

This day came after lots of tears, lots of challenges, lots of heartache. It came after lots of learning, lots of growing and lots of steps of faith. I won't go into the details of this at this time, nor am I going to go into what went in to getting to each part of the day in this post. 

Paul and I got there about 245 pm. We walked into the chapel to meet Father Richard. He prayed and blessed our marriage, our wedding rings and thanked us for bringing our marriage to the church. His words recognized that we had been married and didn't say we hadn't but affirmed that our marriage was not just between us and God but to be brought to the church. 



Then I had to go and meet with Bishop Noonan and acknowledge that I believed in the doctrines of the Catholic Church and in what it is that the Eucharist is. I do. 









We then processed into the church, sat with our sponsors and awaited to be confirmed. Bishop Noonan spoke :  He gave a beautiful homily that I would have agreed with before I was ever Catholic and it reminded me so much more how my faith has not changed but grown, expanded. 

And then we were called up and anointed. The bishop traced a cross on our foreheads with this wonderful smelling balm. It was a moment of beauty and peace and grace, preparing me for the gift of the Eucharist. 





We sat, and the liturgy of the Eucharist  began. As I walked forward my mind and heart was flooded with emotion. I was about to encounter Christ physically. When I was part of various parts of the protestant church I could never understand how Jesus was to be everything for me. I could understand how He could fulfill me spiritually but being such physical people there was no physical way to connect with Christ. Now that I'm Catholic, I can physically encounter Christ through the Eucharist. The words to describe what it felt like are hard to come up with. A warmth and a joy filled my heart that could have knocked me over. All in a moment I felt full of His love. It made real in my heart just what His sacrifice for me was and how amazing it is that He loved me that much. His promise to be with me to the end of the age and to never leave me for forsake me suddenly had weight in my soul. I was mixed with tears of joy and sorrow. Joy to encounter Christ and sorrow for how sinful I am and how unworthy I am for such a gift. I looked back at my husband and saw his eyes welled with tears as if he could feel it all too from his seat. I watched him go up and rejoin the church, taking the Eucharist for the first time and saw his face as he was overwhelmed by the same flood of grace. I finally understood why the mass was focused on this moment. I finally could attest that it's NOT just a cracker and wine. I could finally confess that communion in the protestant church had never been so radical on my heart, even though it had met so much. It stretched my heart all in a moment to overflow and it's a feeling that hasn't shaken each time I've gotten to participate in the Eucharist since (9 times over the course of my vacation, as I went to daily mass).  I wish the words I've drafted could really paint the picture for you but I don't feel they do it justice. All in a moment it's like a ton of bricks hits your heart and yet you feel the arms of Christ wrapped around you. This gift is blessed. This truly is a sacrament of grace. This truly is Christ: body, soul and divinity. 


 A final picture with the bishop, and I was off to thank my family and friends for being there, knowing that many of them observing could only speculate in part as to what the Eucharist might be, but praying they would one day experience the joy and grace of this gift.



My sweet friends were there to celebrate with me and some graciously opened their home to celebrate this occasion. So thankful to celebrate this time with loved ones. (I didn't get pictures with everyone so I'll leave out pictures with friends so not to leave anyone out.)  So blessed to be part of the One, Holy, Catholic and Apostolic Church.



What was your confirmation like? Have you been confirmed? Ever thought about being catholic? Ever wondered what the Eucharist is? Have questions? Don't hesitate to e-mail me or comment: beautifulgoodtrue@gmail.com

<3
Anita

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Grayson Thinks Pro-Life is Anti-Health

Planned Parenthood had a ribbon cutting for their new Kissimmee office today. Alan Grayson was a speaker at the event and shared with channel 9 " Their protests are misguided. What this clinic does is provide healthcare to people who otherwise would not be able to see a doctor when their sick. That's what the clinic is here for. and I think to protest against that indicates that they are anti-health."

While Alan Grayson believes we are anti-health, a large portion of the group outside protesting today, including myself are health care providers in the county, we are not anti-health. We are anti-abortion. We are anti-perforated women's uteruses, and babies torn from the womb. We are anti-racism with the targeting of this clinic being the hispanic community.

Jenna Tosh has stressed that abortion is “less than 10 percent of what we do.” However, in fiscal year 2011, Planned Parenthood of Greater Orlando reported that the total revenue of the non-profit organization was $3,891,501, while $1,412,162 was earned through surgical abortion. This is about 3,000 abortions per year. The salary of the CEO in 2011 was $104,211. Less than 10% that they claim is still creating about 1/3 of their income. 10% has added up. In 2012 Planned Parenthood performed 327,166 abortions, a 2% drop from 2011. In 2002 Planned Parenthood performed 227,385 abortions, meaning they perform more than 100,000 more than they did 10 years ago. Moreover, according to their annual report it's not 10% for pregnant women. It's 10% (well in 2012 it was 11% of their total services). However that year, abortions made up 93.8% of Planned Parenthood's pregnancy services. For every adoption referral they performed 149 abortions. To say abortion is not part of their business plan would be a mis-statement.

Healthcare? Cancer screenings dropped 14% in the 2012-2013 fiscal year, and has dropped 39% since 2009.  Grayson believes I'm against healthcare, but this clinic that he claims is for the sick, isn't doing healthcare but the 70 doctors who have come together here are doing healthcare in Osceola County and the only thing we don't do is abortion. That "10%." We are a county that believes in life, we believe in family and we believe in God.

Grayson, this isn't for the sick. This clinic is for STDs, birth control and abortion. Abortions kills babies. Abortion hurts women. I am not against educating the public on safe sex practices or in treating infections. I'm for treating and catching cancers early, providing women with healthcare and
providing for the women and children in need. I'm just not for murder and that's what I told Nancy Alvarez today : "I'm not against women's health care, I'm against abortion. Abortion is something that ends the life of a beautiful baby and that baby, no matter how it got here is still a gift. And if a woman doesn't want to care for the baby there are hundreds of people who would love to take over," said Osceola County resident Anita Morin.
You can watch that here:
http://www.wftv.com/videos/news/group-protests-as-planned-parenthood-opens/vCbCr2/

I also talked with Mrs. Alvarez about the abundance of pregnancy centers and doctors who have been caring for these people all along. The only thing our county doesn't do is abortion.

So, Mr. Grayson we aren't Anti-Health we are Pro-Life, Pro-women Pro-Babies Pro-Family Pro-minority.

The first inalienable right is life. Please pray with me to protect the children of Osceola County.
Hopefully, the city officials of Kissimmee with see that the B5 zoning does not fit for planned parenthood, but if they won't there are plenty of people willing to stand up for them.

God Bless,
Anita



_______________
Planned Parenthood 2012-2013 Annual report was the main source for these statistics. They aren't made up by some biased group or organization. You can read that report here:  http://www.plannedparenthood.org/files/AR-FY13_111213_vF_rev3_ISSUU.pdf

Saturday, May 10, 2014

It's a matter of life and death.

Death has been all around me.

3 patients have died in the last few weeks. They each were sweet, and had I known my last visit with them was the last I would have spent more time. I would have prayed with them. I would have encouraged them that God loves them and shared with them the gospel. It's easy to look back and say I would have done this or that, and too often I miss opportunities because of desire to stay on time, to try and make sure I get lunch or leave close to on time, and to meet the demands of a  busy work day.

3 patients this past few weeks I signed up for hospice. Cancer. Chronic severe disease. It's admitting that there is nothing more I can do, nothing more that I can treat. The understanding of reaching the line of everything I can do for the patient... to cross over would be to start doing things to the patient. I share the hope of hospice, the gift of dying with dignity and truth of what hospice is and is not.

I listen on the phone as a loved one shares with me the heartbreak of loosing her love. I listen on the phone as a close friend shares the fears of her dad's recent medical diagnosis.

All of these people precious. All of the people I'm praying for their souls that God would have mercy on them, but my heart breaks, for the babies that are going to die in Kissimmee Florida if Planned Parenthood has their way, and opens their mega-center. It breaks my heart that millions of babies have died at the hands of abortionists.  It breaks my heart women don't feel supported to keep their children, and that death is what they choose. These babies we are praying for, these babies we hope to save both in Kissimmee and all over the world are babies that are a beautiful creation. They are miracles because babies aren't made like baking a cake- you don't put the ingredients in the oven and wait for the timer to go off. These babies are just that: babies, not just cells or tissue or a fertilized egg. It's a baby. A beautiful baby.

I can't stop the death of my patients when they are sick past what we can take care of currently with where we have progressed. I can pray that science would continue to progress and that new cures and treatments are found, but I can't stop death of these people. I can however educate moms and help them. I can help stop abortion from being the option for approximately 5000 babies a day. I can work hard, I can pray, I can give it all my spare time, talent and treasure and I can save lives simply by awareness. I can't do it alone. Please join me. Please pray with me. Please protect these lives and help these mothers. Please be willing to take in the children when their mother can't care for them. please be willing to babysit for the single mom when you can, offer food and clothes. Please stand for these babies who can't stand for themselves.

Please. These children need you and it's a matter of life and death.

Thursday, April 24, 2014

The Biggest Claim the Catholic Church Makes Part 1 (History)

Hello Friends,

We all know the Catholic Church makes claims. As I sit and think about the biggest claims that bothered me coming to the church I believe the two biggest would be:
1. The Catholic Church is the one true church
2. Jesus is physically present in the Eucharist (really present, not a symbol).

When I ponder which of these is the bigger claim it would be the second one. The first claim is made by other churches (Jehovah's Witness for example). To claim Jesus is physically present in the Eucharist, in His full body, soul and divinity through a miracle of the Holy Spirit is one that isn't just a small claim, but this claim begs to be addressed. In our world it is easy to accept relative truths, things that might be good for me, but don't affect you. To claim Jesus is truly present in the Catholic Church is a claim that affects everyone. If it is true- then we can't go to another church once we know that our Lord is present in one (not just spiritually present as he is spiritually present everywhere, physically present.) If it is false, that is the biggest heresy catholics have ever claimed. This will be a couple part series to address this question:

Is Jesus present in the Eucharist?

I want to present the evidence and hopefully you can come to the conclusion on whether the catholic church is claiming truth or heresy.

We can start... in the beginning.
History.

What did the early christians believe about the eucharist? What was written down?

Justin the Martyr (100-165)- This man was beheaded for refusing to offer sacrifices to another God. Writings say He glorified God and confessed the Savior while He was scourged and beheaded.  So we can say he was pretty serious about his faith. He wrote:

And this food is called among us the Eucharist of which no one is allowed to partake but the man who believes that the things which we teach are true, and who has been washed with the washing that is for the remission of sins, and unto regeneration, and who is so living as Christ has enjoined. For not as common bread and common drink do we receive these; but in like manner as Jesus Christ our Savior, having been made flesh by the Word of God, had both flesh and blood for our salvation, so likewise have we been taught that the food which is blessed by the prayer of His word, and from which our blood and flesh by transmutation are nourished, is the flesh and blood of that Jesus who was made flesh. For the apostles, in the memoirs composed by them, which are called Gospels, have thus delivered unto us what was enjoined upon them; that Jesus took bread, and when He had given thanks, said, "This do ye in remembrance of Me, this is My body;" and that, after the same manner, having taken the cup and given thanks, He said, "This is My blood;" and gave it to them alone.
-"First Apology", Ch. 66, inter A.D. 148-155.

St. Ignatius of Antioch (the third pope)- an amazing leader and martyr of the church (you will find a theme that most of the faithful were murdered for their beliefs)
"Consider how contrary to the mind of God are the heterodox in regard to the grace of God which has come to us. They have no regard for charity, none for the widow, the orphan, the oppressed, none for the man in prison, the hungry or the thirsty. They abstain from the Eucharist and from prayer, because they do not admit that the Eucharist is the flesh of our Savior Jesus Christ, the flesh which suffered for our sins and which the Father, in His graciousness, raised from the dead."
"Letter to the Smyrnaeans", paragraph 6. circa 80-110 A.D.
(in this letter he also used the phrase "catholic church" for the first time to mean all christians...)

St. Augustine-a man with a radical conversion and a prolific writer who was a Catholic Bishop in 396. He's pretty well known and quoted quite a bit in all christian circles but some of his  writings show his devotion to the Eucharist.

"The fact that our fathers of old offered sacrifices with beasts for victims, which the present-day people of God read about but do not do, is to be understood in no way but this: that those things signified the things that we do in order to draw near to God and to recommend to our neighbor the same purpose. A visible sacrifice, therefore, is the sacrament, that is to say, the sacred sign, of an invisible sacrifice… . Christ is both the Priest, offering Himself, and Himself the Victim. He willed that the sacramental sign of this should be the daily sacrifice of the Church, who, since the Church is His body and He the Head, learns to offer herself through Him.
Source: St. Augustine, The City of God, 10, 5; 10,20, c. 426:

"You ought to know what you have received, what you are going to receive, and what you ought to receive daily. That Bread which you see on the altar, having been sanctified by the word of God, is the Body of Christ. The chalice, or rather, what is in that chalice, having been sanctified by the word of God, is the Blood of Christ."
-"Sermons", [227, 21]


Are there other saints who wrote on this? Of course. Check the resources below because otherwise we will be here forever. The moral of the story. Some pretty radical faithful men of the early church believed Jesus was really present in the Eucharist and it wasn't just a symbol. They viewed this as non-negotiable.

I would encourage you to read the saints and grow from what they share. Of course the writers of the bible were saints...but we will cover that next in the scripture that supports the Eucharist.
I encourage you to pray about this as if you are anything like me- hearing Jesus was present in the Eucharist was such  foreign concept. It sounded ridiculous. Truly, I've met with lots of people and talked with them about this and they have a hard time wrapping their mind around it and when they finally get it they something akin to "you mean like ...eating Jesus !?" Keep in mind this is a miracle of the Holy Spirit. You aren't tasting blood when your drink it and you aren't tasting skin when you eat it. It's a miracle- but more on that later

What have you heard about the Eucharist? Have you ever heard of it?

Good books to read on the topic:
The Mass of the Early Christians - Aquilina
Jesus and the Jewish Roots of the Eucharist - Brant Pitre
Consuming the Word- Scott Hahn

Good resources:
http://www.therealpresence.org/eucharst/father/a5.html (some of the above quotes taken from there but verified that they are really quoted correctly through various online websites.


Have any good books for me? Please comment below. I would love to find more to read! ( I love books).


Friday, April 18, 2014

Last Instructions for a Good Friday

In the gospel of Luke, we see Jesus tells a last parable before the last supper, before His prayer in the garden, before being betrayed, before His scourging and crucifixion,  and one last exhortation is given.

Luke 21:34:
"But take heed to yourselves lest your hearts be weighed down with dissipation and drunkenness and cares of this life, and that day come upon you suddenly like a snare; for it will come upon all who dwell upon the face of the whole earth. But watch at all times, praying you may have strength to escape all these things that will take place, and to stand before the Son of man."

Friends. Let us not forget. Let us take heed. Let us remember what Christ did on that Holy Friday for us. Let us at each moment today not forget the number of times he was wiped and beaten, that we would praise him for each drop of blood He shed, and that we would above all thank Him for His mercy on us. He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him. 2 Corinthians 5:21 Friends He was innocent, and we are guilty. He was sinless and we are sinful. This spotless victim was and is the sacrifice for us and for our salvation. Let that rock our souls and minds each day.

Luke 23:35-43

The rulers sneered at Jesus and said,
"He saved others, let him save himself
if he is the chosen one, the Christ of God."
Even the soldiers jeered at him.
As they approached to offer him wine they called out,
"If you are King of the Jews, save yourself."
Above him there was an inscription that read,
"This is the King of the Jews."

Now one of the criminals hanging there reviled Jesus, saying,
"Are you not the Christ? Save yourself and us."
The other, however, rebuking him, said in reply,
"Have you no fear of God, for you are subject to the same condemnation?
And indeed, we have been condemned justly, for the sentence we received corresponds to our crimes,
but this man has done nothing criminal."
Then he said,"Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom."
He replied to him,"Amen, I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise."

Friends I've written on this a few weeks ago as linked above. Again we see: innocent.

As Luke 23:44-49 recounts:

44 It was now about the sixth hour, and there was darkness over the whole land until the ninth hour, 45 while the sun's light failed; and the curtain of the temple was torn in two. 46 Then Jesus, crying with a loud voice, said, "Father, into thy hands I commit my spirit!" And having said this he breathed his last. 47 Now when the centurion saw what had taken place, he praised God, and said, "Certainly this man was innocent!" 48 And all the multitudes who assembled to see the sight, when they saw what had taken place, returned home beating their breasts. 49 And all his acquaintances and the women who had followed him from Galilee stood at a distance and saw these things.

The last thing He said on the cross: Father into thy hands I commit my spirit. 
Friends isn't that where He is calling us? In his last exhortation He reminds us: take heed, be watchful and what is the last thing He does: surrenders His spirit to God. 

Friends we are called to a life of surrender. A life of trading my will, your will for His will. A life of trusting Him to guide us and keep us. And friends: where God leads you might not be pretty, it might be painful, it might be heartbreaking, but He will never leave you. And Christ, who we remember His passion today, His blood shed tore the veil in two. He was innocent. Let that not become commonplace to us, let that not become just a nice story. That Jesus died for you and for me should be the foundation of everything we are. That Jesus died for you and for me should guide everything we do. That Jesus died for you and for me should change us in such a way that we change the world. And what does He tell us as His parting thought to his exhortation in verse 34:  But watch at all times, praying you may have strength to escape all these things that will take place, and to stand before the Son of man.

Friends. Don't stop watching. Don't stop praying.
Pray that you may have the strength to endure this life and to stand before the Son of man. 


Sunday, March 23, 2014

Pleated Strip Quilt


Hello Friends,
Not too long ago I picked up a new hobby of quilting. I'm no expert by any means but I thought I would share some of my first projects.  The first thing I made was a baby quilt which I will do a tutorial of soon. The second thing I made was a pleated strip quilt for my good friend Kelly. She requested a quilt as a christmas present and I was excited to have a reason to do another. 

I first picked out 8 different fabrics and cut them into 2.5 inch x fabric width strips (most fabrics will be 42 to 43 inches in width making this a nice way to make it uniform. How much fabric you need will depend on the size you want your quilt to be.  As this was only my second time using a rotary cutter and mat, know that you can do this too as long as you can be patient. I did it while catching up on my favorite shows on hulu. 

For pleated strips you will need 3 (2.5 inch by fabric width strips together).




                            
After a little bit your ready to go. I personally liked the idea of coordinating but differing fabrics. The only request I had was purples and greens so I first found that beautiful pink and green flowers fabric 4th from the bottom of the picture above. I then just found fabrics to go with it.
(Note: I'm one of the prefer not to prewash my fabrics people so these are unwashed.)

The next thing to do is to determine your pattern. You can have a set pattern or not it is up to you. I did every 5th strip pleated because I found it would work out nicely with the fabrics I chose. Please feel free to be creative.

Sew your strips together in the patter that you like leaving for 1/4 inch seam allowance. Ensure that you switch ends that you start each new stripe with or your strips will start to curve quite a bit (I learned this the hard way).

When you get to a strip where you want to do pleating. (remember these are 3 strips sewn together to have enough fabric to do the pleating.) Begin by pining the fabric down and then follow into pleat and pin. This is a little time intensive as you need to pin each pleat. Sew into place, unpin and then pin each pleat to the next strip. While it takes a little longer than just a straight strip you will find that the end result looks great.

                                             

                         
As you continue to sew strips it will begin to look like this. Notice how nice the pleated strip looks! It adds a little flair to the quilt but if it seems like too much you could just do strips. When it gets to the desired length your ready to place the batting, back and bind the quilt together. I did quilt the project by "stitching in the ditch" or sewing the top, back and batting together in the seams between the strips. I did this on every 5th strip to create a nice pattern on the back. Being new to quilting this was a good idea as I was not ready for free motion quilting at this point. This tutorial won't cover these steps as I failed to take pictures of this process for you but I hope to get some together soon, however if you good " binding a quilt" you can find lots of help there. 

My final quilt ended up being 42 x 53 a good lap sized quilt. This was the intended size for me but again be creative. The last pictures show the finished product. Keep in mind the way I am holding it in the last one does make it appear as though my stripes aren't straight but they are...for the most part. :) 

Handmade projects are a beautiful way to show people that you love them. I encourage you to try this easy project. If you have questions please let me know. 

<3
Anita 

The Last Thing I Ever Wanted To be...



The last thing I ever wanted to be was Catholic. I grew up in a southern baptist church that while doctrinally does not teach catholicism is evil, the members of my church sure felt that way. I can remember being told that catholics worshipped satan and believing that as I had no reason to question it.

About a year and a half ago my husband and I had been going for 9 months to a nondenominational church. We had tried so hard to get plugged into to the community, he was serving with the youth and I was helping teach a woman's group. We went to bible studies but we still felt as though it wasn't a good fit. We didn't want to be people who just went to what "felt good" so we stayed until God was clear that wasn't our home. Newly married we wanted couples to pour into our lives and help us in this new stage of life. I wanted older women to learn from and Paul wanted men he could grow from and with. We didn't find that where we were and so we left around thanksgiving of 2012. We honestly had no plan of where we were going to go but prayed God would lead us.

We started going to another nondenominational church in Lake Nona, FL. This church had what we wanted: a great marriage ministry and lots of woman who loved God and wanted to know the bible. We got plugged in but still found that some things didn't add up. Doctrinally little things bothered us but nothing had been said that was too far out there. Around this time (January 2013) I was beginning my pediatric neurosurgery rotation.

I can recall just before I started I kept meeting people who were telling me that their bible had more books in it. Growing up baptist I never questioned where the bible came from because if you asked me I would have said "It's the inspired word of God." That's true, but how did it get put together? Did it drop out of a cave ? Did someone find it on an archaeological dig and did it look like my Kids Application Bible or was it more like my grandmothers King James? These questions bothered me but I didn't look much into it as I kind of chalked it up to them being "catholic." No need to look into that.  I rationalized that perhaps they had all the books after hours and hours of research on how the bible was put together and I was certain I was probably missing a few, but I didn't want to be catholic and at least I could say that everything in my bible was inspired but maybe I didn't have the whole bible... so what? Using that logic now I'd tell you that if someone tried to rip out Hebrews or James or Revelation today I'd claim them a heretic (but thats exactly what was done...these three... 4 more for the new testament and 7 from the old. The new testament was fixed but the old testament never was.)

First day of my neurosurgery rotation my preceptor mentions she's Catholic and I should read books by Scott Hahn to learn about the Catholic church. I wrote it down, and forgot about it. I didn't want to read them because I didn't want to be catholic. A few weeks later at her house for lunch she gives me Rome Sweet Home to read. Dr. Hahn is an engaging writer and it took no time to get through the book, and no matter the subject I don't turn down books. I remember thinking some verses he mentioned were puzzling like "the church is the pillar and foundation of truth." Which begs: Which church? I was willing to overlook this information though, until my husband read Rome Sweet Home. We returned the book but couldn't return the ideas. That sunday at church our preacher got up and was speaking on Ephesians 5. He said we were all "predestined in love." He explained this meant that God doesn't love everyone and that He only loves those who are predestined. As we then all stood and sang a song about how God loves us, Paul and I looked at each other knowing we could never go back to this church. It was heretical to say God doesn't love everyone as it destroys the nature of who God is.

Not too long after that Paul and I both felt God putting on our hearts that birth control was not His plan. This culminated in me coming home and sharing what I learned in school that day. As a physician assistant student we discussed all sorts of topics but what we learned about birth control shocked me:

Birth control has 3 functions
1. Ovulation- birth control inhibits ovulation
2. Cervical Mucus- birth control thickens cervical mucus to limit the sperm from getting to the egg should ovulation occur
3. Abortifactant - birth control thins the uterine lining to prevent implantation should the first two mechanisms fail.

I remember not being able to wrap my mind around that third one. "Prevents Implantation." Implantation of what? A baby. Life begins at conception: a baby is made with Gods guidance when egg and sperm meet. It travels down the fallopian tube and ...implants in the uterine lining.  I came home and told Paul I couldn't take it anymore and my heart broke for the babies God might have given that the medication didn't allow to live. This though still breaks my heart and I pray often that one day if that did happen to any that I'll meet them in heaven and be able to honestly apologize because I didn't know. Had I known, I never would have taken that medication. I later learned that birth control starves and suffocates the baby to death even if it does implant. Talk about cruel and no one told me.

Of course no birth control for a newly married couple ...and we started asking people what we should do? At the time I thought babies were made like cakes even though my medical training told me otherwise. Put in the ingredients and wait.  They told us "pray about it." No advice. No answers. I began to research these functions of birth control to learn that the Catholic church knew these functions and thus encouraged natural family planning through a variety of methods (note: the rhythm method is not natural family planning.) I came to a place where I believed what the church said about birth control but I didn't want to be catholic.

We did around this time meet with a Protestant pastor from my baptist church who I respected. I figured he would tell my husband the catholic church is wrong and that would be the end of it. Instead he recommended Sex Love and Marriage by Christopher West and told us the Catholic church has it right on these subjects and we should follow them but ignore the last page on Mary. I couldn't believe my ears and couldn't appreciate that book more...even the last page.

By this time we were attending mass but it wasn't a happy experience. I hated it, Paul felt bad for going but we were certain we didn't want to be separated and when I asked my husband where we should go to church he said : the Catholic church. I'm thankful now that he had an answer because I truthfully didn't. I could tell you why we shouldn't go to many of the other churches in the area but my reasons for not wanting to go to mass were that it was boring as if church was ever for our entertainment rather than for worshipping God. By this time I had figured out they didn't worship satan as they said "Do you renounce Satan and all his works? - I do." It was tough for me to want to stand and kneel and bow to what I wasn't sure. I used it as time to pray that God would either show me the truth of the Catholic church or He would change my husbands heart and take us away from the Catholic church. I found myself defending Catholic doctrine as to dispel misconceptions as I talked to people being clear that I wasn't Catholic but that Catholics do NOT worship Mary, they do NOT worship satan, they DO believe Jesus is truly present in the Eucharist, they do believe marriage is a sacrament... I was clarifying but not sharing, I was reading a lot but much of it I found confusing to what I knew.

It took a lot of prayer, and time for God to open my heart to the Catholic church. I didn't blindly follow Paul and I didn't make it easy as I was questioning everything down to that I wouldn't cross myself without good reason and I wouldn't bow just because everyone else did. I wanted to know why and how and when it started and then decide if I felt we should do it. I won't go into all these things here but what I will tell you is the tipping point was not all of these things, it was the Eucharist.

I read many books during my journey but maybe the two most important were "The Jewish Roots of the Eucharist" by Brandt Pitre and "The Sign of the Cross" by St. Francis De Sales. In the book by Dr. Pitre a trail between the manna of the old testament and the Eucharist of the new testament was carved out showing me truth that I had never encountered and an explanation of scriptures that have baffled people for centuries.  God led me many other places during the reading of that book and I went on a quest to prove that in some way the Eucharist was either true or false as there could be nothing in between. I read books, I scoured scripture, I prayed and through grace God showed me that when Jesus said "My body is true food and my blood is true drink" it wasn't a metaphor or a symbol. It was true. Learning that helped me during mass quite a bit as the mass is all about the Eucharist: it's all about Christ. To claim its Jesus either has to be true or the church is the biggest heretical place out there because they bow to a cracker. Either they are right, or they really are wrong and NOTHING in scripture could show me that it wasn't Jesus and rather all of scripture screamed that it IS Christ.

I'm still learning and growing and I truly could make a whole book out of this story as it was such a journey but my take home message would be to look into it. Look into what they teach and why they teach it and know why you don't believe it. All I was doing was looking for a way out and God slowly brought me in. I'll be confirmed on May 17th in the Roman Catholic Church and it seems like it can't come soon enough.

To say this is the last thing I ever wanted to be would be an understatement, so if you think I'm crazy I completely understand. My husband can attest that this was the hardest decision I have ever made not only in the amount of time it took to come to this conclusion, but also in what it has cost me. It has cost me the ability to practice medicine at a lot of offices as I am a pro-life provider.  It has cost me friends, who have asked me not to be their friend if I'm catholic, or not to talk about it if I am going to be catholic. I've had friends, family and strangers, bosses and potential employers challenge and question my decision to be catholic. It definitely has not been the convenient option. I can tell you it was the right option, because it is following the truth and God's leading.  It's truly a miracle that God has brought me here, where I least wanted to be but I know that He has a plan for me and my faith.

I'd be happy to answer any questions you have please e-mail me at beautifulgoodtrue@gmail.com
I'll tell you it's a journey to the church just as it's a journey to faith in God.