God's Will for us.

For which of you, intending to build a tower, does not sit down first and count the cost, whether he has enough to finish it- luke 14:28

As a type A personality, I can tell you... I'll sit and plan that tower...count the cost...recount the cost..plan some more...count again... and when I'm double and triple sure- I'll build. I've done this most of my life as I grew up with not a whole lot of consistent support and throughout highschool, college, and graduate school didn't really have anyone to lean on other than God. Yet God provided, in miraculous ways. And I found that when He made it clear that I was going to be a PA...that I didn't really have time to sit and count and recount before I built because I had 3 weeks before classes started, and I had no way to pay for it than student loans. So I avoided counting. I avoided looking at my interest rate. I avoided watching the debt add up each semester because I knew there was nothing I could do about it until I graduated.

Now. I'm graduated.

Now they e-mailed me "we are so excited for your graduation.....your student loans are coming to haunt you." Ok so maybe they don't use the word haunt, but they do email me reminding me that I do have loans and I do owe more than I make. But that cost- while great- while maybe not counted and recounted by me- God knew the cost. God knew where He was sending me and God helped me to succeed and survive the program.

I wish I could tell you I just barely survived. But I didn't. I graduated with honors and was chosen for Pi Alpha. God didn't just bring me to it and bring me through it He grew me, shaped me, and made me the person I am today. He allowed me to succeed, gave me the strength to get through the long weeks, and provided a job for me. I've gotten 2 real paychecks so far and I have to tell you that while meeting with a financial planner yesterday he just kept reminding us that we are starting off the right way and that we are in the beginning steps. There is a way out. But its going to take diligence. It's going to take sacrifice. It's going to take trust in the Lord for the unseen. And all the while our financial planner said two things to help us "you know prayer works...and fasting does too." Encouragement from an unlikely place. A reminder to return to where God pushed me for the year: thankfulness. Eucharisteo.

And in this year He has stretched me in a way I couldn't imagine. From pushing me to find truth in faith and not just what sounds good, to learning more about a church than I knew and realizing everything I've been told hasn't always been true even if it made me "feel" good. A church that observes the eucharist and don't think I don't notice that work being the very word of thanks. The very thing I wanted in 2013 as I know His word teaches over and over again :

Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. 1 Thessalonians 5:18.

Wanna know Gods will: thanks. in all circumstances. Even when the tower is built and you didn't count the cost. Even when you can't see the end in site. Even when you seem crazy to the rest of the world. Even when all you have is tears. thanks. thats Gods will. You don't have to discern it...search for it ... try and figure out the celestial morse code. You don't have to claim a dream or vision to know it. He spelled it out.

Thanks. In all circumstances. Period.

Friends please pray that you and I will be thankful. that you and I will pray and fast in a way that causes thankfulness to pour out of us with no hesitation.

thanks.
in all circumstances.
Even if you owe more than you make.
even if you made a mistake.
even if the things you can't mention.

thanks. in all circumstances.